View Full Version : Hello.....

One Armed Gimp
10-16-2008, 03:15 PM
....been a pretty long time. Some of you may remember me as ZT from way back starting in 2000. Anyway, I was unable to register with that name since I think it is to short, so here I am. I look forward to some quality discussions and and catching up on what I missed out on.

10-16-2008, 03:16 PM
Hello Gimp!

Welcome....back....(although I have not even been here a year so it is a fresh welcome from me :))

10-16-2008, 03:19 PM
Wow... from 2000... I'd never even heard of WoT then...

Anyway, welcome, Gimp :D

10-16-2008, 03:27 PM
Hi Gimp...watch out for Brita...she likes to give special welcomes to people, and she has really sharp finger nails!!

10-16-2008, 03:32 PM
Ah yellowbeard- it appears we are once again in the the Newbie Forum together...shall we pick up where we left off ;)

Gimp- tell us a little about yourself and your fetishes...er- i mean hobbies.

10-16-2008, 03:39 PM
well, this time i'll be hiding from Cary when she gets here...avoid the FD. hopefully i won't need the "sponge" bath to get it all off!! allergic to the stuff.

maybe since you won't need to get all the FD off this time, then you won't need to use your hands at all...i'll do something to keep you from getting me w/ the claws again.;)

10-16-2008, 03:41 PM
maybe since you won't need to get all the FD off this time, then you won't need to use your hands at all...i'll do something to keep you from getting me w/ the claws again.;)

What exactly do you have in mind?

10-16-2008, 03:54 PM
What exactly do you have in mind?

hehe...if you really want to know you should PM me. i don't wanna get all the other people reading Gimp's welcome thread embaressed and what not...and probably shouldn't jack it either.;)

so Gimpy...whose your favorite WoT character?

10-16-2008, 03:56 PM
true, true....but you started it...

Sorry Gimp- got all side tracked there...

Who is you least favourite character? Male and female- since almost everybody's least favourite character is one of the females. :rolleyes:

One Armed Gimp
10-16-2008, 04:07 PM
Mat is definitely my favorite character, his storyline is more comical than the others and I like that.

Least favorite, probably Elyane of Egwene. I would say Aram, as a character in the series he served little to no purpose, but I think he was, as has been pointed out elsewhere, possibly a manifestation of Jordan's demon's.

As for fetishes...... well I don't want to scare anyone.

10-16-2008, 04:09 PM
And your least favourite characters (from each gender)?

One Armed Gimp
10-16-2008, 04:50 PM

Male: Mat
Female: Moiraine or possibly Sorilea

Least Fav:

Male: Taim - he just annoys me
Female: as I said before Elayne or Egwene

Cary Sedai
10-16-2008, 05:46 PM
Welcome to Theoryland, Gimp!

~sprinkles Gimp with lots of fairy dust~

~notices Yellowbeard didn't actually hide, smiles gleefully~

Really, fairy dust is non-allergenic. I dont' know why YB sneezes, I think it's a mental problem. Which isn't a problem because I'm sure someone will be along shortly to hand out strait jackets, and he can get one too! :p

Also there should be a fire soon... ~readies marshmellows for roasting~

Mat is my favorite male character and Elayne is my favorite female character. I know, I know... please don't hurt me! ;)

I noticed you reading the Moi = TG thread, jump on in, even though it's pretty long already! :)

10-16-2008, 09:20 PM
You really shouldn't worry about scaring ppl in this crowd. I mean I do this for fun:

*Sets himself on fire*

Anyhoo, sis I think YB is scared of your dust, but claims allergy due to shame of his fear. We should hope he can face it someday, but we best keep this to ourselves and just play along. He'll come 'round.

Oh and welcome (back) OAG!

You may call me "Your High and Might Excelency", but if that is too much for your fingers, Naz will do.

10-16-2008, 09:27 PM
Welcome back, ZT/Gimp. :)

10-17-2008, 01:53 AM
Heya Gimp! Welcome to the Insanity! Don't be afraid to stop by the chatroom (once it exists). It's never scary. Really!

Zaela Sedai
10-17-2008, 01:32 PM
Consider yourself officially welcomed to Theoryland Gimpy! (I really don't think you need this but its been so long why the hell not!) As I'm sure you've noticed, we have a pretty decent community of WoT fanatics over here. One of the ways that we keep it all friendly is a short list of courtesies we ask people to follow and, once in a while, actually do get followed. Imagine that! Insane people following some sort of order!

1) Don't flood the board with multiple THREADS all at once.
Allow us the time to absorb, evaluate, and discuss, OR LAUGH at one or two ideas, OR JOKES at a time. Some of us like to do a little research before responding and that can take a little time. Of course, we also have those others who are just a bit slow. Read that as "just can't handle more than one thought in their heads at once" or "dial-up modem". Your choice. I'd suggest "have a real life", but not likely. Does anyone still have dial up? Wow...it's getting hard to give the slow people an excuse

Addendum to 1) Try to stay on topic.
Going off on tangents can be super fun and is something we are all guilty of your's truly included but try and keep threads on topic unless, 1) the thread is dead or 2) the thread naturally moves over to another topic. This rule is much more lax for joke threads, pop culture threads...etc.

2) Try to back up your opinions & theories.
You'll get a lot more respect if you can. Quotes from the books (of which you CANNOT read too much) are your best weapon. Quotes from interviews are semi-acceptable. Gut feelings are pseudo-acceptable. Whitecloak blind-faith is best submitted while wearing asbestos panties.

3) Feel free to get as emotionally involved as you'd like.
Discussions can get very heated. But try not to take things personally. Remember: we only insult the ones we love. Or the ones we eventually hand over to the Trollocs.

4) Be respectful.
A lot of people have been around Theoryland for a long time. Being a Youngling means you're new around here. We do understand that you may have been reading WoT forever, but if you're gonna pick a fight regarding a WoT theory with someone who's an Elder, Ancient or Hero, understand that they've been around for a while now, and probably have posting friends. And Tamyrlin is Lord of the Board for a reason: this whole place is his brainchild. Keep that in mind. They also have posting enemies.... a good little bit of information to tuck away.

Addendum to 4: This is an international community.
In regards to the Non-WoT discussion groups, please respect the opinions of people from nations and cultures other than your own, even if you disagree with them or the policies of their leaders and politicians. Try to remember that not everyone here has the same outlook or life experience that you might. If you want to send a letter or e-mail to anyone in particular to indicate any specific moral, educational, intellectual, or genetic deficiencies they may have, feel free. Just please don't do it here.

Addendum 1 to Addendum 4: We don't all agree about the issues regarding the military action in Iraq. Post about this issue at your own risk. Things seem to be under control now. Though, there have been some flare-ups….be careful. We have had our own TLers over there, back home safe and sound, hope it stays that way. (I can't wait to be able to delete this Addendum.)

Addendum 2 to Addendum 4: Please no angry profanity.
If you really need to tell someone off, be creative. And replacing characters with @$$ does NOT constitute creativity. I like tend to like the Shakespearean approach myself. The smarter and more subtle you are with it, just makes the person look that much more an idiot.

Addendum 3 to Addendum 4: Please be nice to Newbies.
We were all new at one time you are one right now and there is no need to come down on anyone for asking questions that to the elder community may be basic knowledge. This is for you to remember after you've been here awhile.

Addendum 4 to Addendum 4: Please TRY not to feed the Trolls.
Trust me, it ain't easy at times, but ignore the obvious instigators. Just sit yourself down between the Heroes and Ancients sharpening the WTF Couch sticks. There are many on the board who know how to deal with this breed, leave them to it. It can be quite entertaining. If things get too offensive to the population in general, Mods will intervene. Feel free, however, to respond to Gonzo, our Resident Troll, we love him like a red-headed step child.

5) Please don't use the New Users Forum to recruit.
We have plenty of room in the other forums for begging for support for factions, theories, and the TCA. Please let the newbies look around for a while before taking sides in any pseudo-battles. ~looks around~ our biggest offender has not been around for a while ~sniff~

6) Most important: Have Fun!
We do this because we love it and like to think that we are, at least, reasonably intelligent. Hell, some of us have deluded ourselves into believing that we've evolved into supremely intelligent beings! Half the posters here believe that divine supremacy has already come to them! My vote is for Frenzy, and myself, of course. You know the Truth when you see it. :D Don't let T and her massive bag o' quotes fool you. ;) We will assume some intelligence on your part. You found us, didn't you? Until you prove otherwise…and there are many who have, you'll be safe. If you get hurt if you do prove otherwise, I will offer my one free Healing…but just that once.

Remember, you EARN your respect here, it's not given out freely and some may never know the pleasure.

Welcome to our little rounded corner! It’s a great time!


Zaela Sedai, Official Theoryland Greeter, Mistress of Novices

P.S.: Be good…don’t make me take out my chains, I am the Lady of them for a reason! ;) stupid no evil smilie

Here's some stuff you'd be much better off knowing BEFORE you post :cool:


Heroes of the Horn

Have been here longer than most, and some of them have been around since the dawn of time. You don't have to worship at their feet (well you can worship at Frenzy's, if you must), but a little respect goes a long way.


The next group down from HotH. Also tend to be prolific posters, although some Ancients suffer from a mysterious disease. It sometimes happens that once an Ancient is raised, they disappear for a while, or forever. It really can be a blessing in disguise.


The next group up from Younglings. More knowledgeable than Younglings, not necessarily less knowledgable than Ancients. They have been here long enough to know better about most things. I repeat, MOST things


By far the biggest bunch at Theoryland. Just means that you are recently signed up, not that you're young and/or immature. You might have to prove that, though. But you can edit your own posts! Yippee! Umm yeah...enjoy that.

So, how do you move up the Ranks?

Well, posting madly and racking up a huge post count, begging for Reputation Scores won't get you anywhere. It's not even just about hanging around for a set amount of time.

Here's how you DO move up: participate thoughtfully and politely so that when Tamyrlin decides the time has come for a Raising, you're seen as an asset to the community. Or whenever he gets around to it.

When the feeling strikes him, Tamyrlin, The Lord Of The Board aka LotB, or Fearless Leader or Lordy, (but only I may get away with that one), confers with the Heroes of the Horn and Ancients and selects those to be raised to a higher level. It is an entirely manual and subjective process that stresses "quality" over "quantity." The amount of time since you gained your current rank plays a role, as do post counts, to a lesser extent. Thoughtful, intelligent and polite posting is by far the biggest factor.

Other important information...

The ESC does not stand for Escape. Instead it stands for the Entropy Sideline Club It has a big comfy couch, capable of fitting all TL members at once if they choose to sit there. Made of fire-proof, balefire-proof, and belafire-proof hope to God you aren't in the room if this occurs fabric. Comes with all sorts of built in coolers stuffed full of yummy snacks and drinks; for some reason, Mountain Dew seems to be a favourite around here and lots of places to just sit back and enjoy the reason you're sitting there. Basically if you hang out on the ESC Couch, you are observing the debates taking place: Iraq, religion, government, Santa Claus (you name it, we argue over it) and laughing at the people who are debating, and/or the debate itself. The ESC is not full of fence-sitters, rather we are ambivalent or way too smart to jump in. Or lazy. Most times, it's lazy. The ESC Couch (ESC Head Quarters) is located somewhere fun...lots of room for partying whenever the mood strikes us. We have recently debuted the WTF Couch...for those "Special" moments. Moments that induce the sharpening of the not-so-elusive poking stick. Poking posters with sticks is exclusively limited to Ancients and Heroes. We do, however, take requests.

The TCA. Theoryland Chataholics Anonymous. This group is comprised mostly of the younger set of TL members. not that there's anything wrong with that I have been assured they do more than sit in corners and stare at their navels. although I've yet to see evidence of that ~sarcasm~ They have a lot of fun, and most of it involves cookies. They are somewhat defunct right now, as we have no chat, alas! Don't worry, they'll be back with a vengeance as soon as chat is up and running here. Lordy says, soon. ~shifty eyes~

Quotemasters, AKA Masters/Mistresses of the Quote:
If you sign up for a Premium membership to the site, you get the ability to search the database for quotes to back up your theories, or the theories of those you like. It also gives you the ability to slam dunk the theories of others with a really well-placed quote. A Premium membership only costs $15 for a year and $50 for a lifetime membership. Just do it, you know you want to! But, a warning. Being in possession of a TL Premium membership does not a Quotemaster make. You must apprentice and train under the Quotemasters. Of which there are two and three quarters. Jason Wolfbrother, Callandor retired for now, Terez and the Quote Mistress, although she seems to be in semi-retirement: Me. You'll see me throw one in every now and again! Frenzy was the Dark Mother of us all she may occasionally find some time when her biological children are occupied and throw in a quote or two ;) Downside? You only get 100 quote searches a month, and a true quotemaster is invariably without quote searches towards the end, so they get cranky. Withdrawal does that, didn't ya know?

OK, I'm done. Hope for YOUR sake you read all that!:cool:

10-17-2008, 06:38 PM
Welcome to TL, Gimp -- or welcome back, though that sounds weird since I didn't start until 2005...

We're still just sorta spinning our wheels rehashing old questions until Brandon hands us a new toy.

May we inquire about your name?

Speaking of names... Yellowbeard, as I type, I note we have another new member, name of "YellowBeard" with a capital B...


10-17-2008, 07:38 PM
Hey Zae - I am no longer in semi-retirement. That really didn't last all that long...

10-17-2008, 11:20 PM
welcome, welcome

*rolls in the keg*

have a beer

*hands over a beer*

Cary Sedai
10-18-2008, 10:27 AM
~roasts some marshmellows over Naz, hands them out to eveyrone, holds up a bottle of mead and a horned viking helmet, smiles at DahL~:D

Crispin's Crispian
10-20-2008, 10:53 AM
Holy crap...ZT?

Anyway, I'm Crispian now, but used to be known as SDog. I think we started around the same time--right before the move to cgiforme?

Anyway, welcome back. Just in time to for the run-up to the new book. :D

One Armed Gimp
10-20-2008, 12:20 PM
Yeah we did start around the same time, long time ago.

As for inquiries on the current name. Well I picked it up out of the blue while playing video games online and it has stuck ever since.

Thanks for the beer DahLliA. I am a pretty avid beer geek. Any other avid beer geeks here?

10-20-2008, 06:04 PM
Yes. We even have a member whose sig says "If you don't like beer, then I don't like you!" :)

10-20-2008, 08:00 PM
Welcome Back...glad to see you found your way back. I'm guessing you left before I came around in 03.

10-20-2008, 08:11 PM
ZT? I remember that name. Posted like, once or twice when I first joined. People freaked cause they thought he had left for good.

Welcome back.

10-20-2008, 10:00 PM
I've only seen the name in the archives. Pretty sure Mato joined before me. :)

Shock Lance
10-20-2008, 11:12 PM
Welcome/ Welcome back Gimp

Post only when the beer tells you too and remember to ask yourself if you are typing with both hands then who is holding the beer?

~grabs a six pack from the newly installed ESC Beer Fridge takes the viking helmet from Cary (to use as a bottle opener) and jumps on the couch~

10-21-2008, 01:54 AM
I joined about 2 or 3 weeks before you (you being, of course, Terez), as I recall...at least, on the message boards.

10-21-2008, 03:25 AM
Ah, okay. So I was probably around on theoryland.com for about 6 months before you joined.

10-21-2008, 02:39 PM
Welcome back, Gimp! :D

So, you dislike Egwene and Elayne? I like you already. :D

10-21-2008, 02:52 PM
So, you dislike Egwene and Elayne? I like you already. :D

Oh brother :rolleyes:


10-21-2008, 03:23 PM
I like both of them, but both of them annoy me also...

10-21-2008, 05:22 PM
Come visit us in the chat, Gimpy!:D

(I love saying that...)

10-21-2008, 05:45 PM
Oh brother :rolleyes:

Come on; I don't see how anyone in their right mind could not want to rip their hair out whenever a Egwene POV comes up... :D

Anaiya Sedai
10-21-2008, 06:46 PM
a newbie thread (even if it's not strictly speaking one :D ).. and I missed it :eek:

anyways, welcome :D

do we have a fire yet?
~rolls in a keg of mead and sits on it~

can I get some fairy dust? *smiles sweetly*

10-21-2008, 07:11 PM
Terez, I was on TL about 3 months before I joined the messageboards, IIRC.

Course, I think that still makes you the one who's been here the longest.

10-21-2008, 07:58 PM
I joined the main site in October '04. Wow, it's been four years...

10-21-2008, 09:39 PM
Found my old vBulletin account: I joined the messageboards Aug 23, 2004. Or so I think.

10-21-2008, 10:16 PM
You win. :D

10-21-2008, 11:29 PM
Come visit us in the chat, Gimpy!:D

(I love saying that...)

Someone gave you chat?

Holy hell....

Welcome Gimpy.

Shocky. you Aussie bastard, pass me a beer!

Purple Dragon
10-22-2008, 04:02 AM
Hola Shrimpy...

don't listen to Tana... never do that... you'll be better off;)

Shock Lance
10-22-2008, 10:30 PM
~Passes Tan a Beer~

10-31-2008, 01:56 AM
Welcome (back) to Theoryland!!! Enjoy your stay, please have a beer and join the TCA in the chat. Now that I have some time, the princess may begin to reappear in there with the The Queen, her near- sis.

~grabs a beer~

Fun... ;) ;) :D :D ;) ;)