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View Full Version : Shayol Ghul Gazette - Bermuda Triangle Edition


Spidy
03-06-2009, 05:03 AM
So it was supposed to be the “In Depth with the Lord ‘O’ the Board” for the next edition of the SG Gazette (Grammar Nazi’s, we need an apostrophe and quotation expert to provide advice as the Gholam Typing Pool vow and declare that the original edition banner headline should have been punctuated this way, “In depth with the “Lord ‘O’ the Board”” and after the Uno’s proclamation of double benefits we were down the gurgler like a Myyrdraal’s pet rat on Gazette costs so we had to cut back somewhere and a couple of quotation marks got the chop but quality has always been at the forefront of SG Gazette standards and we aren’t quite sure how to handle this one. And on punctuation and grammar, we should never start a sentence with ‘And’ and I just did, so Phooey to you who are dissing the Gazette faithful right now, and also this may be the longest ever qualifying statement in parathenthesis (stuff it brackets, easier to spell) that has no actual bearing on the original story and contains double paranthes, uhm brackets).

Back on the Banana Lounge and we actually have no “In Depth” to bring you this week, because we couldn’t actually find Tam for the story. It all seemed to be related to the damned their/they’re/there word muckups that appear to affect all sorts of writers or conversationalists who put their words in writing. (Got the ‘their’ right this time, Ed). So the effects are twofold, one, mirror edition article published with obvious wrong usage of ‘their’; two, Editor has failed to implement a quality framework that all reporters must adhere to, from a spelling and grammar perspective. More on the latter later and did we slip that semi-colon in correctly?

So, as I mentioned before, its double benefits time at Shayol Ghul, therefore we must look to conserve all types of costs and on this basis the SG Gazette has declared anathaema on their/they’re/there and from now on we will be striving (and we will fail miserably, Ed) to ensure that in all instances where their/they’re/there would have been used, we are now going to use ‘thare’ (not used in any foreign language that we are aware of and has one simple spelling).

Why are we doing this? Well not just from a cost perspective. Careful reading of all Gazette articles since day dot, (now where did that quote come from, and what is a day dot anyway? Ed) have identified numerous instances of “thare” inappropriate usage. Interrogation of the few Hamsters from ISTW that we still have in a detention facility, on thare day release activities, the Hamsters reported inappropriate use of “thare” in an astounding number of posts on the TL message board.

Now as opposed to just making things easier for us, the main reason we are doing this is because after we finally put the ‘thare’ thing right we realised that we couldn’t find Tam anymore because he used to live thare, and now he lived, thare, and if you asked him on the phone or email he said he used to live thare and now he lived here and the ‘here and thare’ interaction was broken. By introducing thare we stuffed it all up completely and in a nutshell had no idea where to find him for the interview because he was no longer thare.

First steps for SG Gazette peeps will be to update all maps with thare location markers and hopefully when this fiasco has been sorted out we can get back on duty of proclaiming what you always wanted to know Gazette faithful, what’s the DO going to do when he leaves thare and gets here. That is if the maps are working by then and he can find his way.