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View Full Version : Note to self: Don't do laundry when drunk


Oatman
06-24-2009, 08:59 AM
http://www.stuff.co.nz/dominion-post/news/2525227/Trapped-nude-with-a-dryer-on-his-head

Don't ask Dave Chapman why he climbed into the clothes dryer, it's an answer that eludes even him.

All he will say is the experience that followed won't be repeated.

His experience involves one pair of underpants, a Hoover 5050 ED heavy-duty dryer (with a 5kg load-bearing capability) and Dave.

He had been drinking with a few mates at Waipopo, near Timaru, on Saturday and went to change his clothes. When it came to finding a pair of undies to put on, Dave checked the dryer.

"By that time, I'd had a fair bit to drink; I don't know what flaming possessed me to get in it. I was trying to find these undies when everything just got stuck."

Dave, who still hadn't found the clothes to cover his lower half, managed to fit his head, shoulders and arms into the dryer in his search for appropriate clothing.

"I thought my undies were there, but obviously not."

Wedged in the 30cm-wide opening of the hot, recently used dryer up to his armpits, Dave let out a cry for help. By this stage, the heat from the dried clothes was getting to him. "I was panicking because there was no air," he said.

Thrashing around in a desperate bid to escape, Dave found his situation get worse. The dryer, which sat on another one, fell to the floor, on top of him. "Somehow I managed to move the whole thing. I fell over with it on my head."

His friends lifted the device back to its resting place, with Dave still stuck inside. Soon after they were joined by ambulance staff, a female police officer and the Washdyke and Temuka fire brigades.

A naked Dave found his nether regions exposed to the world. "They told me to remain calm and all that stuff. I said: 'Well you get in here'."

The fire crews took parts off the dryer, lifted Dave horizontally, and pulled him from his prison. He's still hurting a bit, with grazes and bruises, but he's glad to be free.

The dryer is back together, Dave is recovering and the undies . . . well, they were never there - the clothes in the dryer weren't his.

I have a policy of not putting my head into appliances, and after this story I think I'll keep it.

Zanguini
06-24-2009, 09:06 AM
this is a good way to start the day dealing with freshman all day long takes a toll on you its good to start out the day with people i can laugh at

Brita
06-24-2009, 09:24 AM
LOL!

Frenzy
06-24-2009, 09:37 AM
Zan, get more coffee. Then read that sentence.

Sarevok
06-24-2009, 09:38 AM
ROFLMAO!!

GonzoTheGreat
06-24-2009, 09:46 AM
If that female police officer were sufficiently impressed by what she saw, this could actually be an anti-Darwin Award. :p

Brita
06-24-2009, 10:12 AM
If that female police officer were sufficiently impressed by what she saw, this could actually be an anti-Darwin Award. :p

lol!

The anti-Darwin Award: An award bestowed on those whose utter stupidity inexplicably and unexpectedly enhances their survival advantage.

Oatman
06-24-2009, 10:34 AM
The anti-Darwin Award: An award bestowed on those whose utter stupidity inexplicably and unexpectedly enhances their survival advantage.

I think that should be creating reproductive opportunity rather than survival advantage. Unless putting his head had some type of health/virility benefit.

Brita
06-24-2009, 10:45 AM
Hmmm, right. Revised definition:

The anti-Darwin Award: An award bestowed on those whose utter stupidity inexplicably and unexpectedly enhances their ability to perpetuate their genes.

Oatman
06-24-2009, 10:51 AM
Much better.

Crispin's Crispian
06-24-2009, 11:20 AM
Zan, get more coffee. Then read that sentence.
That was funnier than the article, truly.

~sips his coffee~

Zanguini
06-24-2009, 12:27 PM
coffee is nasty and it was early in the morning

DahLliA
06-24-2009, 01:09 PM
it probably seemed like a good idea at the time :p

btw since his name is Chapman. any relation to our resident Chapmen? ;)

tworiverswoman
06-24-2009, 01:46 PM
"They told me to remain calm and all that stuff. I said: 'Well you get in here'." My favorite line.

LOL

And nice wording, Brita.