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View Full Version : A carry over from the "little things" thread


Basel Gill
06-03-2010, 02:29 PM
Seems to have come up, so IF you don't mind me asking who has decided not to have children and why? Do you regret it?

My wife and I were about 95% against at the beginning, but she has gotten (and me to a smaller extent) a little taste of mortality. The idea that it ends with us, there's no one to come after, all that jazz.

Just curious what the take is since it seems at least several of you have made that choice.

Davian93
06-03-2010, 02:37 PM
We likely won't ever have our own for medical reasons...but we plan on adopting (or finding one on top of a mountain after a battle) as we do want kids at some point.

JSUCamel
06-03-2010, 03:27 PM
Seems to have come up, so IF you don't mind me asking who has decided not to have children and why? Do you regret it?

My wife and I were about 95% against at the beginning, but she has gotten (and me to a smaller extent) a little taste of mortality. The idea that it ends with us, there's no one to come after, all that jazz.

Just curious what the take is since it seems at least several of you have made that choice.

I'm not gonna have my own (biological) kids for a variety of health/medical-related reasons, but I'm not opposed to adopting. I'm perfectly okay with being a stepfather (i <3 hot moms), but I don't really have any desire to actively try and become a father.

Not to mention I think I'd make a terrible father.

Ishara
06-03-2010, 04:07 PM
Pfft. I don't think you would B!!! Funny Dads are awesome.

Us? ...it's planned. Someday, sometime. I had a big plan to be done by 30, with a nice 3-4 year gap in between, but alas, it was not to be.

It sounds silly, but I really look forward to watch him parent. In a good way. He will make an awesome Dad.

DahLliA
06-03-2010, 04:38 PM
just a disclaimer first since almost all my female RL friends seem to take my opinion as an insult: this is just my opinion and if you are happy with your choice when it comes to kids, good for you. I'm in no way attacking other people's choices.

that out of the way. my reasons for not wanting to have kids is:
1. the world, humanity and life in general sucks. I don't want to bring more of us into the world
2. overpopulation. I follow the view that overpopulation starts way before people start starving to death from lack of food.
3. I don't mix well with kids, so I'm pretty sure I'd be a horrible father.
4. kids are just way too much work.

the exception to this would be if I wake up stinking rich one day. then I'd most likely stop being such a pessimist(since I could just spend loads of cash on fun stuff and never worry about anything ever again) plus I'd be able to pay people to take care of my kids when they were crying/need changing/throw tantrums etc.
(and I guess this is another good reason for me to never have kids :p)

Ivhon
06-03-2010, 04:38 PM
We made an agreement when we got married to wait for 5 years before having kids. It has now been 6 almost.

Personally, I'm ambivalent about the thing (Im a guy). The missus is bitten right now, though, so Im going to bite the bullet and do my duty.

I know it will be the best thing that ever happenned, yadayada...but boy am I gonna miss the freedom.

SauceyBlueConfetti
06-03-2010, 05:26 PM
Never say never. I am over 40 now and was a bit shocked by the pregnancy in progress. I married late (by choice) and to be honest, had accepted that due to age and medical issues it just wasn't in the cards. I was wrong. And extremely happy :)

Brita
06-03-2010, 06:45 PM
Never say never. I am over 40 now and was a bit shocked by the pregnancy in progress. I married late (by choice) and to be honest, had accepted that due to age and medical issues it just wasn't in the cards. I was wrong. And extremely happy :)

Yay!

Basel Gill
06-03-2010, 09:05 PM
I seriously appreciate the responses. It's nice to know that my original opinion about kids is not just me (too much work, miss the freedom, etc.).

Saucy...how do you feel about kids later in life? I am 36 and I sometimes think about having a teenager while I'm 50 something, it just seems overwhelming!

Sei'taer
06-03-2010, 10:26 PM
I seriously appreciate the responses. It's nice to know that my original opinion about kids is not just me (too much work, miss the freedom, etc.).

Saucy...how do you feel about kids later in life? I am 36 and I sometimes think about having a teenager while I'm 50 something, it just seems overwhelming!

I have a 19 yr old, a 13 yr old, a 9 yr old and a 4 yr old...and I'm getting old.

JSUCamel
06-03-2010, 10:49 PM
I have a 19 yr old

Hook me up, yo.

Isabel
06-03-2010, 11:36 PM
Hook me up, yo.

Brian: that is so wrong in so many ways....................
:eek:

Ivhon
06-04-2010, 12:04 AM
I seriously appreciate the responses. It's nice to know that my original opinion about kids is not just me (too much work, miss the freedom, etc.).

Saucy...how do you feel about kids later in life? I am 36 and I sometimes think about having a teenager while I'm 50 something, it just seems overwhelming!

If things go by plan, I will be 39 when first kid comes. If not, I'll be 40 plus. I'm not worried too much about keeping up, though

yks 6nnetu hing
06-04-2010, 02:26 AM
We made an agreement when we got married to wait for 5 years before having kids. It has now been 6 almost.

Personally, I'm ambivalent about the thing (Im a guy). The missus is bitten right now, though, so Im going to bite the bullet and do my duty.

I know it will be the best thing that ever happenned, yadayada...but boy am I gonna miss the freedom.

lol, I first read "...when we got marinated..."

me... I'm 25, the clock's not ticking (yet).

Mort
06-04-2010, 03:05 AM
I love kids. I want kids someday, but definitely not now.
I became an uncle when I was 16, and I love my niece to death. Probably helped me decide I want kids.

GonzoTheGreat
06-04-2010, 03:35 AM
Pfft. I don't think you would B!!! Funny Dads are awesome.I don't think you should call him B. That could easily lead to confusion with B. BG, or Bee Gee, would be far better.

Me, I've seen kids. I have even been a child myself. I have no intention at all of having any of my own.
I do not think I would be a good enough, let alone a good, father. So having children would be immoral.

irerancincpkc
06-04-2010, 07:13 AM
I come from a family of ten kids, so I want kids, but probly not till I'm in my late twenties/early thirties...

JSUCamel
06-04-2010, 08:06 AM
Brian: that is so wrong in so many ways....................
:eek:

What? She's legal!

Sei'taer
06-04-2010, 08:12 AM
What? She's legal!

Yeah, and you're gonna be a partially deaf, tranplantee with no friggin' legs...and when I say legs, I mean all of them.

Ishara
06-04-2010, 08:51 AM
just a disclaimer first since almost all my female RL friends seem to take my opinion as an insult: this is just my opinion and if you are happy with your choice when it comes to kids, good for you. I'm in no way attacking other people's choices.

that out of the way. my reasons for not wanting to have kids is:
1. the world, humanity and life in general sucks. I don't want to bring more of us into the world
2. overpopulation. I follow the view that overpopulation starts way before people start starving to death from lack of food.
3. I don't mix well with kids, so I'm pretty sure I'd be a horrible father.
4. kids are just way too much work.

the exception to this would be if I wake up stinking rich one day. then I'd most likely stop being such a pessimist(since I could just spend loads of cash on fun stuff and never worry about anything ever again) plus I'd be able to pay people to take care of my kids when they were crying/need changing/throw tantrums etc.
(and I guess this is another good reason for me to never have kids :p)

I really don't like when people (mostly women) get all judgy on people who don't want to have children. Why is that a BAD thing? Not everyone wants to have kids, and they don't need to have global reasons for that either.

I do take issue with the rabid people on both sides of the fence. The child free by choice people don't need to call me a breeder or mock my chosen lifestyle either. Can we not just live and let live? I promise not to be a SanctiMommy. ;)

We made an agreement when we got married to wait for 5 years before having kids. It has now been 6 almost.

Personally, I'm ambivalent about the thing (Im a guy). The missus is bitten right now, though, so Im going to bite the bullet and do my duty.

I know it will be the best thing that ever happenned, yadayada...but boy am I gonna miss the freedom.
Oh yeah...that "duty" must just suck Ivhon. LOL

Never say never. I am over 40 now and was a bit shocked by the pregnancy in progress. I married late (by choice) and to be honest, had accepted that due to age and medical issues it just wasn't in the cards. I was wrong. And extremely happy :)

Squeee!

Sei'taer
06-04-2010, 09:06 AM
Never say never. I am over 40 now and was a bit shocked by the pregnancy in progress. I married late (by choice) and to be honest, had accepted that due to age and medical issues it just wasn't in the cards. I was wrong. And extremely happy :)

So...will the baby be Voluptuousblueconfetti? Sassyblueconfetti? Smartassblueconfetti? Just curious...

Ivhon
06-04-2010, 09:23 AM
I really don't like when people (mostly women) get all judgy on people who don't want to have children. Why is that a BAD thing? Not everyone wants to have kids, and they don't need to have global reasons for that either.

All kinds of studies are showing that couples without children correlate with being happier than couples with, overall

I do take issue with the rabid people on both sides of the fence. The child free by choice people don't need to call me a breeder or mock my chosen lifestyle either. Can we not just live and let live? I promise not to be a SanctiMommy. ;)


Oh yeah...that "duty" must just suck Ivhon. LOL

That part doesnt suck. Its the next ~30 years (more than one kid is planned) that I'm more worried about

Squeee!

yeah.

GonzoTheGreat
06-04-2010, 09:44 AM
Oh yeah...that "duty" must just suck Ivhon.Are you sure that'll work? :confused:

Isabel
06-04-2010, 09:51 AM
What? She's legal!

**sniff** **tugging my non existing braid*** while shaking my head and saying men are stupid .....**

(and yes, I am generalising :P)
:D

Crispin's Crispian
06-04-2010, 10:16 AM
**sniff** **tugging my non existing braid*** while shaking my head and saying men are stupid .....**

(and yes, I am generalising :P)
:D

It takes two to tango. Then again, you'd have to give Taer's daughter credit for dating a guy with no legs.

Uno
06-04-2010, 11:15 AM
I just need to become wealthy enough to hire a governess to look after the kids until they are old enough to go to an expensive boarding school. What? It's the approach to childrearing that made the British Empire great.

Ishara
06-04-2010, 12:50 PM
But Ivhon, that's part of what I'm talking about. I don't care about the studies. I don't need/ want a justification, and other people shouldn't either.

In fact, your justification could be used to denigrate my decision to (eventually) have children. Do you see what I'm saying?

Uno
06-04-2010, 01:14 PM
But Ivhon, that's part of what I'm talking about. I don't care about the studies. I don't need/ want a justification, and other people shouldn't either.

That's fine, but you're getting justifications, anyway. It would be a funny old world if we all got what we wanted. Consider the impossibility of the coexistence of the Sinistrian and the Gonzonian doctrines.

I'm basically a bad person, and that's reason enough to make me hesitate to have kids. Besides, I've got a sneaking suspicion that I'm not that long for this world, and that's another.

Crispin's Crispian
06-04-2010, 03:20 PM
I'm basically a bad person, and that's reason enough to make me hesitate to have kids. Besides, I've got a sneaking suspicion that I'm not that long for this world, and that's another.

Wait wait...are you part of SpaceX (http://www.wired.com/autopia/2010/06/space-x-goes-into-earth-orbit/)?

Uno
06-04-2010, 03:31 PM
Wait wait...are you part of SpaceX (http://www.wired.com/autopia/2010/06/space-x-goes-into-earth-orbit/)?

Yeah, that's it. I'm an astronaut. The real reason I don't have kids is that the princess I picked up won't stop making out with her brother long enough to give me the time of day. Also, I'm too busy rounding up a rag-tag team of historians to blow up asteroids.

Sei'taer
06-04-2010, 03:45 PM
I'm basically a bad person,

Wait, you've always been a sweetling to me. I actually kind of dig you and your big, bad, baby bear attitude! I almost bought a pipe that looks like the one in your avatar. I mean, you're like an anti-hero. Like Darth Vader in High heels, like Darth Maul with a dasiy tattoo, like Sauron with one big fiery eye (oh...that didn't work so good did it?), like Frenzy on a good day, Like Baxter Caine without any money, Like the Black Knight before he got his arm off, Like Col. Nathan Jessup, when he thought you couldn't handle the truth, Like Hannibal Lecter and fava beans...

Uno
06-04-2010, 03:50 PM
Wait, you've always been a sweetling to me. I actually kind of dig you and your big, bad, baby bear attitude! I almost bought a pipe that looks like the one in your avatar. I mean, you're like an anti-hero. Like Darth Vader in High heels, like Darth Maul with a dasiy tattoo, like Sauron with one big fiery eye (oh...that didn't work so good did it?), like Frenzy on a good day, Like Baxter Caine without any money, Like the Black Knight before he got his arm off, Like Col. Nathan Jessup, when he thought you couldn't handle the truth, Like Hannibal Lecter and fava beans...

Good stuff, but I'm starting to suspect that you drink entirely too much moonshine.

Crispin's Crispian
06-04-2010, 05:33 PM
Good stuff, but I'm starting to suspect that you drink entirely too much moonshine.

Starting to suspect? You really are getting old.

Uno
06-04-2010, 05:42 PM
Starting to suspect? You really are getting old.

That, or I simply have a liberal view of how much is too much. Although I don't think I've actually drunk moonshine more than once in my life, and I was a mere lad at the time.

SauceyBlueConfetti
06-04-2010, 08:08 PM
So...will the baby be Voluptuousblueconfetti? Sassyblueconfetti? Smartassblueconfetti? Just curious...

Right now, we are just callin' it "the Biscuit". I assume you approve.

Sei'taer
06-04-2010, 08:12 PM
Right now, we are just callin' it "the Biscuit". I assume you approve.

Hell yeah, I love biscuits!

Zaela Sedai
06-04-2010, 09:53 PM
I aleays swore I'd only have one and be done by 30... the latter is still possible. But I got remarried and wanted another. He's a year early but thats ok! And now Jay's running with the possiblility of another, I could still be done by 30...but more like 31 if we had another after this. (I'll be 28 this month and spawnage is comin in Sept)

GonzoTheGreat
06-05-2010, 03:00 AM
Zae, if you hurry up, you can have half a dozen more before you're 35.

Anaiya Sedai
06-05-2010, 03:55 AM
things change. I always thought I'd be a terrible mother, but that I would probably have a child or two eventually.
then too many things happened, and that was that.

Zaela Sedai
06-05-2010, 10:09 AM
things change. I always thought I'd be a terrible mother, but that I would probably have a child or two eventually.
then too many things happened, and that was that.


you're a great mama always letting raptor chew on your face :)

Anaiya Sedai
06-05-2010, 01:18 PM
you're a great mama always letting raptor chew on your face :)
lol I don't usually let him, he just climbs on me and bites. Now he's learned to crawl, nothing is safe. I'm covered in bite marks and scratches.