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JSUCamel
06-08-2010, 09:33 AM
I do web development for a small firm in Atlanta. A few months ago, we had a client come in for an initial meeting. My boss, a brilliant designer, generally asks questions to get an idea of what a business is like, so that he can create a design that fits their desires. His questions are less about "what colors do you like?" and more along the lines of "What exactly does your business do?".

This client comes in and sits down, and after some initial small talk and introductions, my boss gets down to business:

Boss: What kind of business are you in?

Client: Well, we generate innovative paradigm shifts for capitalized markets.

Boss: Yes, but what exactly is it that your company does?

Client: Most of the time we monetize metrics-based niche pillars, but we also often strategize monetizable innovation parallel paths.

Boss: ...?

Long story short, we never did figure out exactly what it was this guy did, but he loved the website anyway. He was some sort of consultant or another.

Anyway, we thought the whole conversation was hysterical, and thus an idea for a mobile app was born: Capsule CEO -- your personal adviser during economic virtual transitions and aggregating professional risk!

My coworker did the iPhone version and I built the Android version. I hope you guys download it and like it. It's funny, and you can push your favorite corporate buzz phrases to Facebook and Twitter. Plus, it'll make your boss think you know what you're talking about!

Here's the link: www.capsuleceo.com

And if you have an Android, you can simply take a picture of this and it will download it for you:

http://capsuleceo.com/i/qrcode.png

I'd love any feedback you guys have :)

Ivhon
06-08-2010, 09:50 AM
I have the iPhone version. Always good for a reminder of why I left the world of action-items, deliverables, paradigms, proactivity and other bs speak.

Crispin's Crispian
06-08-2010, 10:13 AM
So what did do Camel, just upload a bunch of buzzwords, classify them by the type of word (verb, noun, etc.) and string them together?

Sounds like fun. Maybe I'll develop one for my industry.


"We need to utilize real-time performance modeling to actualize deliverable solutions with actionable takeaways."

The sad thing is that I know exactly what that means.

Ivhon
06-08-2010, 10:20 AM
"We need to utilize real-time performance modeling to actualize deliverable solutions with actionable takeaways."

The sad thing is that I know exactly what that means.

aka Have your employees put there numbers/tickets/whatever into the tracking platform as they complete them so you can figure out who to fire.

JSUCamel
06-08-2010, 11:15 AM
So what did do Camel, just upload a bunch of buzzwords, classify them by the type of word (verb, noun, etc.) and string them together?

Pretty much, yeah :) It's really more of a "hey, check it out, we can make iPhone apps and Android apps now" kinda thing. Now when we talk to clients, we can say "Yes, we can make you an iPhone app. Here's something we've already made". It's a nice portfolio piece. We've got a few other things in the mobile pipeline... but it's fun :)

Crispin's Crispian
06-08-2010, 11:51 AM
aka Have your employees put there numbers/tickets/whatever into the tracking platform as they complete them so you can figure out who to fire.

That's the beauty of corporate-speak--it can apply to almost anything. ;)

Brita
06-08-2010, 11:51 AM
So Camel, which way to go for a smart phone? i-phone or droid?

JSUCamel
06-08-2010, 11:57 AM
So Camel, which way to go for a smart phone? i-phone or droid?

I like them both. I have an iPhone, but my brother has a Droid. I think the major difference, user experience-wise, is the fact that Droid has a physical keyboard, while the iPhone is a digital keyboard (on screen). Other than that, it's really just a matter of preference. I don't think either one is better than the other.

ShadowbaneX
06-08-2010, 12:02 PM
what? No Blackberry? You don't support the device from your homeland?!

JSUCamel
06-08-2010, 12:13 PM
what? No Blackberry? You don't support the device from your homeland?!

Blackberries are for chumps.

Davian93
06-08-2010, 12:25 PM
Blackberries are for chumps.

And people that actually use their phones for work...

ShadowbaneX
06-08-2010, 12:27 PM
not always. I know a few others (mostly geekish types) that have Blackberries because they just prefer them over the other smart phones.

JSUCamel
06-08-2010, 12:33 PM
And people that actually use their phones for work...

not always. I know a few others (mostly geekish types) that have Blackberries because they just prefer them over the other smart phones.

Chumps!

Mort
06-08-2010, 02:41 PM
I think you're forgetting HTC in that discussion. I would probably get a HTC Desire instead of a Droid. A Sony Ericsson X10 might be nice to consider as well.

Now that the Iphone 4 has been introduced, I get a little mixed up on what smartphone I really want :) Followed Steve Jobs key note yesterday and got a little excited. Damn you Apple!

Although I've gotten excited about a lot of smartphones the last few years :)

I do believe that Iphone makes a better phone, especially now with the Iphone 4 coming out. Camera has always been an issue with Iphone for example. What I don't like is the overly watchful app-store they run. I would like to be able to use any app, no matter if Apple or whoever approves it or not.

Brita
06-08-2010, 02:49 PM
what? No Blackberry? You don't support the device from your homeland?!

Haha! Somehow I just knew what Camel would say about a blackberry, and I was right!

Ishara
06-08-2010, 10:30 PM
what? No Blackberry? You don't support the device from your homeland?!
When did Came; become a Canadian? Not that I mid of course, I'm just confused.

I think you're forgetting HTC in that discussion. I would probably get a HTC Desire instead of a Droid. A Sony Ericsson X10 might be nice to consider as well.

Now that the Iphone 4 has been introduced, I get a little mixed up on what smartphone I really want :) Followed Steve Jobs key note yesterday and got a little excited. Damn you Apple!

Although I've gotten excited about a lot of smartphones the last few years :)

I do believe that Iphone makes a better phone, especially now with the Iphone 4 coming out. Camera has always been an issue with Iphone for example. What I don't like is the overly watchful app-store they run. I would like to be able to use any app, no matter if Apple or whoever approves it or not.

Um, have you seen SOOC (straight out of camera) iPhone pics? Some of them are awesome! It's certainly not a Canon/ Nikon quality, but if you use it properly, it's certainly serviceable.

Ivhon
06-08-2010, 10:56 PM
I actually think that the app should be perfect for a crackberry. I always associate crackberries with the overt corporatism expressed in deliverables, executables, actionables and 3am emails.

ShadowbaneX
06-08-2010, 11:54 PM
When did Came; become a Canadian? Not that I mid of course, I'm just confused...

Not Camel, Blackberry. Last I checked Camel isn't a device.

The makers are Research in Motion aka RIM. One of the CEOs is Jim Balsillie, the guy trying to bring a Hockey team to Southern Ontario.

GonzoTheGreat
06-09-2010, 03:23 AM
Not Camel, Blackberry. Last I checked Camel isn't a device.I dunno. There are device drivers, after all. And the Camel driver (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bashir_Ahmad_(camel_driver)) would seem to be just a specific instance of that class.

Mort
06-09-2010, 03:34 AM
Um, have you seen SOOC (straight out of camera) iPhone pics? Some of them are awesome! It's certainly not a Canon/ Nikon quality, but if you use it properly, it's certainly serviceable.

No mobile camera is able to go up against a "real" camera, of course. But all the smartphones that are considered competitors to the Iphone right now has a better camera. Dunno how that changed with Iphone 4 came out though. HTC EVO 4G and Sony Ericsson X10 (SE is a good choice if you want a good camera with your phone) has one of the best cameras out there at the moment.