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View Full Version : Fresh Meat for the Trollocs


Alanna Alai
08-30-2010, 01:40 AM
Hello all, I think the title just about describes me...

Sarevok
08-30-2010, 01:48 AM
Nice title! :D

Welcome to TL. :)

tworiverswoman
08-30-2010, 01:50 AM
w00t!! ~rubs hands together briskly~

A NEWBIE!!!! It's been forever!! ~looks over shoulder, "Get the cookpot out, boys! We gots us a N00B!~

I, alas, have to confess to having some acquaintance with you, so I can't quite cut loose as badly as I want to -- at least not until someone else has had their fun with you. ~snickers evilly~

Next?

Nazbaque
08-30-2010, 04:50 AM
Hmmmm I think I'll just go lie under the cookpot.

*waves stick*

Now set me on fire you young hooligans. I am an Ancient.

And welcome Alanna!!

You may call me Naz!

The less insane people will join us shortly.

Anaiya Sedai
08-30-2010, 05:18 AM
~waves~
welcome to TL!
Tell us a little about yourself!

yks 6nnetu hing
08-30-2010, 06:23 AM
Welcome Alanna :)

DahLliA
08-30-2010, 10:46 AM
welcome :D

Zaela Sedai
08-30-2010, 06:40 PM
Consider yourself officially welcomed to Theoryland Alanna!! (Will you jump in the pot for the Trollocs too? I'm getting too tired to keep throwin bad newbies in!!!) As I'm sure you've noticed, we have a pretty decent community of WoT fanatics over here. One of the ways that we keep it all friendly is a short list of courtesies we ask people to follow and, once in a while, actually do get followed. Imagine that! Insane people following some sort of order!


1) Don't flood the board with multiple THREADS all at once.
Allow us the time to absorb, evaluate, and discuss, OR LAUGH at one or two ideas, OR JOKES at a time. Some of us like to do a little research before responding and that can take a little time. Of course, we also have those others who are just a bit slow. Read that as "just can't handle more than one thought in their heads at once" or "dial-up modem". Your choice. I'd suggest "have a real life", but not likely. Does anyone still have dial up? Wow...it's getting hard to give the slow people an excuse

Addendum to 1) Try to stay on topic.
Going off on tangents can be super fun and is something we are all guilty of your's truly included but try and keep threads on topic unless, 1) the thread is dead or 2) the thread naturally moves over to another topic. This rule is much more lax for joke threads, pop culture threads...etc.

2) Try to back up your opinions & theories.
You'll get a lot more respect if you can. Quotes from the books (of which you CANNOT read too much) are your best weapon. Quotes from interviews are semi-acceptable. Gut feelings are pseudo-acceptable. Whitecloak blind-faith is best submitted while wearing asbestos panties.

3) Feel free to get as emotionally involved as you'd like.
Discussions can get very heated. But try not to take things personally. Remember: we only insult the ones we love. Or the ones we eventually hand over to the Trollocs.

4) Be respectful.
A lot of people have been around Theoryland for a long time. Being a Youngling means you're new around here. We do understand that you may have been reading WoT forever, but if you're gonna pick a fight regarding a WoT theory with someone who's an Elder, Ancient or Hero, understand that they've been around for a while now, and probably have posting friends. And Tamyrlin is Lord of the Board for a reason: this whole place is his brainchild. Keep that in mind. They also have posting enemies.... a good little bit of information to tuck away.

Addendum to 4: This is an international community.
In regards to the Non-WoT discussion groups, please respect the opinions of people from nations and cultures other than your own, even if you disagree with them or the policies of their leaders and politicians. Try to remember that not everyone here has the same outlook or life experience that you might. If you want to send a letter or e-mail to anyone in particular to indicate any specific moral, educational, intellectual, or genetic deficiencies they may have, feel free. Just please don't do it here.

Addendum 1 to Addendum 4: We don't all agree about the issues regarding the military action in Iraq. Post about this issue at your own risk. Things seem to be under control now. Though, there have been some flare-ups….be careful. We have had our own TLers over there, back home safe and sound, hope it stays that way. (I can't wait to be able to delete this Addendum.)

Addendum 2 to Addendum 4: Please no angry profanity.
If you really need to tell someone off, be creative. And replacing characters with @$$ does NOT constitute creativity. I like tend to like the Shakespearean approach myself. The smarter and more subtle you are with it, just makes the person look that much more an idiot.


Addendum 3 to Addendum 4: Please be nice to Newbies.
We were all new at one time you are one right now and there is no need to come down on anyone for asking questions that to the elder community may be basic knowledge. This is for you to remember after you've been here awhile.


Addendum 4 to Addendum 4: Please TRY not to feed the Trolls.
Trust me, it ain't easy at times, but ignore the obvious instigators. Just sit yourself down between the Heroes and Ancients sharpening the WTF Couch sticks. There are many on the board who know how to deal with this breed, leave them to it. It can be quite entertaining. If things get too offensive to the population in general, Mods will intervene. Feel free, however, to respond to Gonzo, our Resident Troll, we love him like a red-headed step child.

5) Please don't use the New Users Forum to recruit.
We have plenty of room in the other forums for begging for support for factions, theories, and the TCA. Please let the newbies look around for a while before taking sides in any pseudo-battles. ~looks around~ our biggest offender has not been around for a while ~sniff~


6) Most important: Have Fun!
We do this because we love it and like to think that we are, at least, reasonably intelligent. Hell, some of us have deluded ourselves into believing that we've evolved into supremely intelligent beings! Half the posters here believe that divine supremacy has already come to them! My vote is for Frenzy, and myself, of course. You know the Truth when you see it. Don't let T and her massive bag o' quotes fool you. We will assume some intelligence on your part. You found us, didn't you? Until you prove otherwise…and there are many who have, you'll be safe. If you get hurt if you do prove otherwise, I will offer my one free Healing…but just that once. After that you get to meet a special pair of chains, Mwahahahaa

Remember, you EARN your respect here, it's not given out freely and some may never know the pleasure.


Welcome to our little rounded corner! It’s a great time!



Enjoy!

Zaela Sedai, Official Theoryland Greeter, Mistress of Novices

Davian93
08-30-2010, 06:43 PM
Welcome to Theoryland, Alanna!




Do we really not have any other Alannas? Wow...guess we must not.

Zaela Sedai
08-31-2010, 06:05 PM
Do we really not have any other Alannas? Wow...guess we must not.



I know... I pondered the same thing

Alanna Alai
08-31-2010, 08:32 PM
Thank you all for your warm welcome! So warm in fact that I think I'll avoid the trollocs and their cookfires for a bit.

You asked a bit about me? Nietzsche said "If you stare into the Abyss long enough the Abyss stares back at you." so I'll be nice and only give you a peek. Just remember, you did ask.

First off, despite my name, I'm a guy (waits patiently until PD stops grumbling). I picked then name because, well, I liked it! I'm 31 (about to be 32) and living outside New York City. I'm a fan of pretty much anything fantasy. Jordan, Martin, Mcaffery, Rowling, Tolkein, Meyer, Asimov, Clarke, love them all. Writing this I'm wincing at putting some of these together in the same sentence, but I do find all their works enjoyable (If for different reasons).

I play Guild Wars and hope to play Guild Wars 2 when it's released. In fact, that's how I came to these forums. I met Tru, PD, Jakob and Sare in Guild Wars. I also play Dungeons and Dragons (3.5 edition) and am currently DMing a campaign with several members of these forums.

Ok, that's the peek. if you want more, you'll have to risk the Abyss. Just a parting note to resident Troll(oc)s: I have a very thick skin, but if you feel you must try to get under it to the juicy stuff, please leave a recipe. If I'm going to be eaten (alive or otherwise) I'd at least like to know I'll taste good.

Sarevok
09-01-2010, 06:45 AM
I play Guild Wars and hope to play Guild Wars 2 when it's released. In fact, that's how I came to these forums. I met Tru, PD, Jakob and Sare in Guild Wars. I also play Dungeons and Dragons (3.5 edition) and am currently DMing a campaign with several members of these forums.

Hold on... Light, is that you? :D

yks 6nnetu hing
09-01-2010, 07:19 AM
Ok, that's the peek. if you want more, you'll have to risk the Abyss. Just a parting note to resident Troll(oc)s: I have a very thick skin, but if you feel you must try to get under it to the juicy stuff, please leave a recipe. If I'm going to be eaten (alive or otherwise) I'd at least like to know I'll taste good.

you have this obsession about being eaten. Traumatic childhood?

anyways, I think that's pretty unique... we don't have anyone with that particlar... fixation. As far as I know.

tworiverswoman
09-01-2010, 12:52 PM
Hold on... Light, is that you? :Dand am currently DMing a campaign with several members of these forums.
*ahem* - Sare, how did you miss THIS part?

Anaiya Sedai
09-01-2010, 03:02 PM
Light? that rings a bell.....

Sarevok
09-01-2010, 03:46 PM
*ahem* - Sare, how did you miss THIS part?

Oh... I saw the first part and kinda jumped to conclusions, since I actually met Alanna Alai(who is, of course, NOT Light Ranger) FIRST as a DM and in GW second. :)

tworiverswoman
09-01-2010, 04:21 PM
I think we've disappointed "Al" in not being a little more ... madcap with him/er. Do I blame that on end-of-summer fatigue or the pronounced absence of my Asha'man?

My friend, you've only scratched the surface of the usual collection of answers we demand around here...

Who's your favorite WoT character?
Your least favorite?
Have you a favorite scene?
A "WTF was he THINKING" scene? (100,000 trollocs...)
Opinions about Asmodean or the "death" of Moiraine? Or her future? LTT: brain fart or voice from beyond?

Then, of course, there's all the usual stuff on the non-WoT threads for you to stick your neck out on... Trust me, you'll find plenty of trolloc cookpots there, no matter WHICH way your winds blow.




Naz, your fire seems to be guttering out. Let me touch that up a little. ~pours some thermite dust on you~

~begins hunting for coconut marshmallows~

Alanna Alai
09-01-2010, 09:38 PM
"Al"? I may have to divulge my real name to avoid that one.

Favorite character? That'd be myself. What was that? Oh, favorite WOT character, sorry, my bad. That'd be Perrin. He's a noble who always had a good heart and didn't want the gig to begin with. I think there's plent of hooks to really develop there and JR did a really good job with him. Loial's a close second though for much the same reasons.

Least favorite? Well Masema made the hairs on my neck rise, so in that respect he might qualify.

Hands down my favorite scene was when Egwene realized her power as Amyrlin and laid into her babysitters. I like scenes where the tables get turned or the unexpected happens.

The most puzzling WTF moment was, to me, the removal of the primary characters support in to form of Moraine. At that point they really had no clue what was going on. Ok, maybe an inkling.

I think Moraine will be back before the end. I think the beings in the other dimension - the one Matt got his weapon from - will play a role in the end and Moraine will come with them. Just a gut hunch and backed up by nothing more than the slimmest of connections between the two.

I don't think Lews Therin is simple enough to reduce to those choices. I think whatever forces destroyed LTT's body carried his essence through time and he is reborn in Rand's body. That really sucks to be Rand, but it could work to his advantage - as long as his visitor isn't insane. Oh, wait, nevermind. It sucks to be Rand. :)

Oh yes, and I did have a traumatic childhood, but more to the point, I'm a man of the senses. I appreciate good taste wherever I find it - even if it's me. :)

yks 6nnetu hing
09-02-2010, 01:43 AM
JR did a really good job with him. JR? I'm a bit young so I've only heard references to it, didn't really personally experience... but I think there was once a JR who got shot, and it was a huge mystery as to whodunit Oh yes, and I did have a traumatic childhood, but more to the point, I'm a man of the senses. I appreciate good taste wherever I find it - even if it's me. :)so... you mean to say, you make a good grilled cheese sandwich?







I'm sorry, I couldn't resist:o

Nazbaque
09-02-2010, 06:19 AM
I think we've disappointed "Al" in not being a little more ... madcap with him/er. Do I blame that on end-of-summer fatigue or the pronounced absence of my Asha'man?
No you don't get to blame it on PD, Tru. Why? Because I miss Freya a lot more than you miss PD and I still don't blame anything on her.

DahLliA
09-02-2010, 09:58 AM
JR? I'm a bit young so I've only heard references to it, didn't really personally experience... but I think there was once a JR who got shot, and it was a huge mystery as to whodunit so... you mean to say, you make a good grilled cheese sandwich?







I'm sorry, I couldn't resist:o

now you've done it :eek:

tworiverswoman
09-02-2010, 01:39 PM
you mean to say, you make a good grilled cheese sandwich?I suspect that he'd admit to enjoying a good ... grilled cheese sandwich. Not many guys would turn one down.

~wanders off, whistling innocently~



Oh, and Naz - I don't miss PD, or at least, if I do, I always have time to reload. ;)

Alanna Alai
09-02-2010, 01:51 PM
Sorry that was a typo, JR did get shot.

As a man of the senses I really do enjoy a good grilled cheese sandwich in only the way my girlfriend prepares it. <text removed>

Edit:
I thought I'd tone it down a bit, but careful what you ask for, you may get it. :)

tworiverswoman
09-02-2010, 06:44 PM
It has sometimes crossed my mind, whenever the "grilled cheese" meme resurfaced, that if anyone ever got LITERAL about this, there would be some rather appalling burn scars to explain to the ER crew...

Hot cheese is HOT!

Anaiya Sedai
09-04-2010, 06:52 AM
~chuckles~

where did you find this one, tru? we actually have a newbie who isn't scared of us yet!

iokepa
09-04-2010, 07:34 AM
scared? who's scared?

~runs back a safe distance~

;)

GonzoTheGreat
09-04-2010, 07:34 AM
It has sometimes crossed my mind, whenever the "grilled cheese" meme resurfaced, that if anyone ever got LITERAL about this, there would be some rather appalling burn scars to explain to the ER crew...

Hot cheese is HOT!There are probably web sites out there catering to this fetish, but I don't think that I am particularly eager to get any links to them.

tworiverswoman
09-04-2010, 08:45 PM
Gonzo... I'm really sorry you aroused my curiosity, there...

http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g7/tworiverswoman/temp%20files/fetish.jpg

Really? 910,000 results?

Sigh...

Nazbaque
09-05-2010, 05:06 AM
Well that would be because of the words "hot" and "fetish". Not really that surprising. Try googling it as a phrase instead of three separate words.

*Waits a bit*

Hell I'm too curious I'll do it myself.

*Googles*

Okay so we got two results. That actually is surprising. I was expecting at least a hundred. Maybe it's all the innuendo.

Sarevok
09-05-2010, 05:26 AM
*Googles*

Okay so we got two results. That actually is surprising. I was expecting at least a hundred. Maybe it's all the innuendo.

However a search for ' "hot cheese" fetish ' gives 631 results. :p

Nazbaque
09-05-2010, 05:46 AM
Ooooooh and just ' "cheese fetish" ' gets 17,100

*Takes closer look*

bloody hell... there is actually a site www.cheesefetish.com

Purple Dragon
09-07-2010, 11:17 AM
"tock tock tock"

~the sound of a canes rhytmic thumbing on the floor alarms you of a new pressense

as you quickly turn around you are at first unable to see anyone there.

as you settle down with the thought that your mind was playing tricks on you, a sinister looking man all dressed in purple leather steps out from the shadows, in his left hand he's brandishing a cane of a purple so dark as to look almost black, tipped in silver and with a handle wrought to look like a Dragon's head~

"So... you're feeling safe now? even trespassing in MY Domain?"

~the stranger looks at you with contempt in his eyes and an evil grin~

"you better have a VERY good reason to be here or my pets will be fed early today!"

~a low omnious grumbling sound comes from behind the stranger~

Nazbaque
09-07-2010, 11:33 AM
Tru, would you stop the omnious grumbling. It is making me sleepy.

Cary Sedai
09-07-2010, 01:02 PM
Welcome!!!

~dumps fairy dust over the newbie~

Hi, I'm late. I'd say fashionably.. but I can't spell, and I don't think I wear anything you'd consider fashionable....

So, you know my Dragon and my Warder Sister...

GonzoTheGreat
09-15-2010, 09:07 AM
Gonzo... I'm really sorry you aroused ...Giggity? :confused:

Matoyak
09-19-2010, 11:25 PM
I believe I know you, Alanna, via Skype (DnD (just listening in, though), and GW) though Tru won't confirm or deny (ignorin' me, tha jerk :( :p)

Welcome to the insanity, hope ya stick around.

tworiverswoman
09-20-2010, 12:43 AM
Giggity? :confused:I"m really disappointed in you, Gonzo... It took you ELEVEN DAYS to notice that bit of inuendo? Sheesh. I'll expect you to do better, next time.:p

GonzoTheGreat
09-20-2010, 04:21 AM
I"m really disappointed in you, Gonzo... It took you ELEVEN DAYS to notice that bit of inuendo? Sheesh. I'll expect you to do better, next time.:pIt didn't take me that long to notice it, it took me that long to come up with a reply I dared post here.
The one I used now is not very good, I'll admit. But with some earlier possibilities I could see why I would not want to use them, and I suspect that if I had used one of those, then some others would've noticed those possibilities too.

Alanna Alai
09-27-2010, 12:16 PM
Really Gonzo?

If the point of being safe was not to scare me off, then I can assure you it won't be that easy. Look what I did with the grilled cheese reference.

I say let the innuendo fly and let slip the cats of fun!

GonzoTheGreat
09-27-2010, 12:27 PM
If the point of being safe was not to scare me off, then I can assure you it won't be that easy. Look what I did with the grilled cheese reference.Your safety? Ah yes, now that you mention it, I could've considered that too.