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Hopper
08-13-2008, 10:20 AM
Dapple and I are going to need strength later on today. We need to have a "telephone use" discussion with the kidlet. She ran up $150 in long distance charges on the home phone and is currently pushing 22 hours (with a week left to the month) of phone use on her cell. The only thing saving her life is that most of that time is off peak. I will be calm . . . . I will be calm . . . . . .I will be calm . . . . . .

I never would have guessed that an almost 13-year-old could talk on the phone for that long. I do know that she won't be talking for that long any more.

caladanbrood
08-13-2008, 10:23 AM
How do you spend that much money on phonecalls??:eek:

Terez
08-13-2008, 10:23 AM
I'm not into praying, but I can sympathize. My youngest stepsister did the same thing several times (after having had her phone taken away, and then having been given another chance.... several times). Good luck, and remember...slow, deep breaths! :D

Ishara
08-13-2008, 10:24 AM
HA! My 20 year old sister (who's on my bf and I's family plan) racked up over $200 in one month of text messaging. That's over and above the 500 free texts we have. Thankfully, she handed over the cash gracefully.

Brita
08-13-2008, 10:26 AM
Oh man...good luck Hopper! Remember the three c's- consistent consequences calmly.

(heh, I just made that up- not bad)

Sarevok
08-13-2008, 10:26 AM
Hehe, my sister got a big phone bill a while ago, dunno how much. She fell asleep while on the phone with her boyfriend... and so did he, apparently. Anyway, they were on the phone all night...

Cary Sedai
08-13-2008, 10:27 AM
~prays~

Believe it, that's what teenage girls do. Trust me, it's normal. I can remember talking on the phone all night long and hiding in my closet to do so, so my mother wouldn't hear me. School the next day would be hell...but at the time it was worth it.

Of course, I didn't have a cell phone, and the calls were local, so no way for my mother to catch me. Hehe, I just had a slight wave of "mwhahahahah" for kids these days, can't be cool on a home phone, but the cell phone bill will rat you out! Mwahahahaha :D

Terez
08-13-2008, 10:30 AM
I've never liked talking on the phone. Oh, I wanted a phone when I was a kid, just because I wasn't allowed to have one, but I hardly ever used it once I got it. My cell phone plan is the cheapest one Verizon offers, because I never come anywhere even close to maxing out what that plan offers.

Most companies will give a flat rate for texts, though, and it's not usually unreasonable (it's $10 a month for Verizon).

Hopper
08-13-2008, 10:33 AM
She doesn't text. That's all straight up phone calls.

Terez
08-13-2008, 10:34 AM
A teenager that doesn't text? :eek:

Zaela Sedai
08-13-2008, 10:39 AM
Thats a shock... My dad racked up a $140 bill on txt messages... yes that's 1700 txts, they now have the unlimited plan.

Kidlet should be using the cell phone to make those long distance calls....then you wouldn't get charged....you should bite the kidlet on the nose for not being smart!!

And I was on the phone for hours at a time at that age... back when call waiting was the cool thing to have... then we'd call others who had it and so on...get like 10 peeps on the phone at once...

Gilshalos Sedai
08-13-2008, 10:41 AM
I have unlimited texts, thankfully.

Hopper, that sounds like Bryan's younger brother's cell bill. He DL'ed Guitar Hero on his phone, not realizing his parents didn't have a data package. I'm surprised the boy's still ambulatory.


Take deep breaths, Hopper.

Terez
08-13-2008, 10:46 AM
And I was on the phone for hours at a time at that age... back when call waiting was the cool thing to have... then we'd call others who had it and so on...get like 10 peeps on the phone at once...
I remember when call waiting was cool...and "three-way" calling...

tanaww
08-13-2008, 10:48 AM
I'll pray for you sir. You'll need it. Even my own sweet B racked up some big bills on my plan with her texting addiction. If she weren't so far away, I'd have killed her but instead I just changed my plan.

Davian93
08-13-2008, 10:55 AM
From what I know of teenage girls (not a lot), the usage sounds pretty normal. Remember that when you're beating her with a phonebook (they dont leave marks) ;)


I think certain cell carriers allow you to get phones that only work during certain times (unless its an emergency)and and you can lock features like texting so she can't use it for a while...that would work. On the home phone...just get a long distance pin so you have to dial the pin to get long distance service and of course don't give her the pin.

Or you could use a sack of valencia oranges...they won't leave a bruise...that's what Bing Crosby did.;)

Yuri33
08-13-2008, 12:16 PM
Remember that when you're beating her with a phonebook

Images of Jason Bourne beating up another dude with a book in Tangiers are flashing through my head. I do appreciate the sack of oranges reference--I just saw that episode again last night.

BTW, text messaging is the biggest ripoff (http://www.techcrunch.com/2008/07/01/atts-text-messages-cost-1310-per-megabyte/) in communication products ever created.

irerancincpkc
08-13-2008, 12:21 PM
My parents almost murdered my sister when she racked up over $180 in texts, then they got the unlimited plan. :D

Just stay calm, I will pray. :D

Mort
08-13-2008, 12:26 PM
Never had a problem with cellphone bills, I got a cellphone when I was 16 but I had I card where I had to put in money to call with, when they were gone, they were gone. Paid for it myself too.
My thing were being on the internet with the dial up modem, my parents probably wanted to kill me there for a while :)

Ishara
08-13-2008, 12:42 PM
All jokes aside, I would explain the consequences of her actions to her and give her an opportunity to both learn from the mistake and address some of the consequences herself.

Denying her the ability to use the phone at all, or even during certain hours won't teach her to be responsible - but explaining why use shuold be limited would, imo. Also, maybe have her pay back some of the usage, through deductions on her allowance or for extra chores around the house?

Davian93
08-13-2008, 12:55 PM
All jokes aside, I would explain the consequences of her actions to her and give her an opportunity to both learn from the mistake and address some of the consequences herself.

Denying her the ability to use the phone at all, or even during certain hours won't teach her to be responsible - but explaining why use shuold be limited would, imo. Also, maybe have her pay back some of the usage, through deductions on her allowance or for extra chores around the house?


You should punish and teach...the denial (a temporary one) would prove that there are consequences to actions. That's a very important life lesson that all kids should learn.

Hopper
08-13-2008, 01:15 PM
Well, considering that we have another week on this month's cell phone and we're already 88 minutes over our plan, the only phone calls she's going to making will be to me, her mother, or her father.

As for the home phone, she was never supposed to be making long distance calls. The problem is probably that she didn't realize what "long distance" really comes down to. After all, North Carolina isn't that far from Georgia.

Davian93
08-13-2008, 01:36 PM
They DO share a border afterall...wait a minute...no they dont

Ivhon
08-13-2008, 01:54 PM
North Carolina is precisely 1 hour 57 minutes away from Georgia at an average rate of 74 mph along the I-85 southbound corridor.

Popular non-metropolitan stops for fuel, food and uhh... facilitating would include Gaffney, SC on the north end and Anderson, SC on the south. Greenville/Spartanburg should be avoided as traffic can sometimes pile up.

As for cellphone use. I always found that the noise of a leather belt doubled on itself and snapped together was a particularly effective way for my parents - father, really - to emphasize a point.

Davian93
08-13-2008, 01:57 PM
Scratch that...they DO share a border...I just failed basic geography.

Weird Harold
08-13-2008, 01:59 PM
I never would have guessed that an almost 13-year-old could talk on the phone for that long. I do know that she won't be talking for that long any more.

Both of my daughters were on a three minutes per call limit from the very first time I tried to call home and got a busy signal with call-waiting.

I gave each of them an egg-timer and if they were on the phone, there had better be sand running through the egg-timer.

My granddaughter's, otoh, each have cell-phone and each gets their own "bill" from their Mom for 'personal' calls and text messaging. They have gotten a sense of what using their cell phones cost right from the very beginning and don't abuse them like normal teenagers do.

Brita
08-13-2008, 02:15 PM
Up until I was 12 we had an actual "party line". The old Finnish lady down the road would always try to eavesdrop- you could hear the click as she ever-so-carefully picked up the receiver. I would wait a minute or two (to give her the benefit of the doubt) and then politely say "Mrs. Illka, I am having a private conversation." She would also tie up the neighbourhood line for hours with her gossip.

When I turned 13 I was just glad to have a private line for our household!

Kids these days, spoiled rotten, right Dav?

Davian93
08-13-2008, 02:21 PM
Yup.

Gilshalos Sedai
08-13-2008, 02:36 PM
"... uphill both ways... in the snow... all year long...."

Davian93
08-13-2008, 02:38 PM
Am I too young to be considered crotchety?

Brita
08-13-2008, 02:54 PM
Am I too young to be considered crotchety?

You should ask if you can be a part of the Old Phartes Club! Although none of them are even as close to as crotchety as you are :) I mean that in the nicest way possible :p

Sei'taer
08-13-2008, 04:22 PM
Learned something from Yuri's link. Web 2.0...who knew. Maybe I need to look at the dork sites more often...uh, not that their really dorks just nerdy...uhm I mean they're cool and all but would you want to take them out to...uh...well...it's like this see..um yeah moving on...


I knew a guy who could soup up the chip on my car once...he had a laptop and pants that were too short...he wasn't a dork though or a nerd, because he knew how to make my car fast and he was always overspending on his cell limits...well not really a cell, he had a carphone, one of those big huge ones that mounted in your car and a swwweeeeet rx-7 that would outrun a vette. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is he made his money making cars go fast and paid for his phone out of his own pocket. I think making your own money and paying your own bills is the key to being fiscally responsible.

Davian93
08-13-2008, 07:01 PM
I think making your own money and paying your own bills is the key to being fiscally responsible

I agree completely...probably comes from my lower middle class background.

Terez
08-14-2008, 02:25 AM
BTW, text messaging is the biggest ripoff (http://www.techcrunch.com/2008/07/01/atts-text-messages-cost-1310-per-megabyte/) in communication products ever created.
I remember when text messages were only used by people who had pre-paid phones, because when they were out of minutes, they could still send text messages for free. Then they got popular, and the phone companies decided they could make some bank off of them...

How did it go, Hopper?

cottillion
08-14-2008, 02:34 AM
Consider yourself lucky. I have a cousin thats 15 years old and thought she had unlimited texting and when they got the bill there was about 9,000 texts over the 500 she was given. Also a good friend of mine racked up over a $500 bill in a month calling and texting her girlfriend who was deployed in Iraq a few months ago.

Hopper
08-14-2008, 05:41 AM
It went very well. She has no phone (except calls to me, my wife, and her dad) for 2 weeks and no computer for a week. Her dad already knows and supports the punishment.

The whole thing was done in as loving and supportive way as we could and she took it very well. She is OK with her punishment and we let her e-mail her friends to let them know she would be incommunicado for a little while.

At one point her "boyfriend" called her phone. It was sitting next to me and when she came over to see who was, she just reached out and touched the phone and went back to her room. The look on her face almost broke me. She was just going to tell him about it at school, but he called back less than 30 seconds later so we let her talk to him so that he knew about the punishment too.

Mort
08-14-2008, 07:04 AM
At one point her "boyfriend" called her phone.

Haha, citationmarks are funny :) I would love to hear your need for them :)

Ishara
08-14-2008, 07:48 AM
I agree completely...probably comes from my lower middle class background.
Snob! Maybe it just comes from good common sense. :p

Hopper
08-14-2008, 07:59 AM
Haha, citationmarks are funny :) I would love to hear your need for them :)


So far as I can tell, it's a school yard kind of "dating". All summer long I think they spoke twice and never met up once.

Besides, according to Dapple, she's not allowed to officially date until she's 16. If it were up to me it wouldn't be until 27.

Mort
08-14-2008, 08:04 AM
So far as I can tell, it's a school yard kind of "dating". All summer long I think they spoke twice and never met up once.

Besides, according to Dapple, she's not allowed to officially date until she's 16. If it were up to me it wouldn't be until 27.

Oh, haha :)

I think it's interesting how different we treat boys and girls. Had she been a boy instead the whole dating thing wouldn't have been much of an age issue :)

I'm very curious about how I will feel when/if I get a son/daughter.

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 08:10 AM
Sorry, we have a son, he's not dating, either. ;)

Mort
08-14-2008, 08:20 AM
Sorry, we have a son, he's not dating, either. ;)

Since when did you get a son? Oh I get it! It's one of those contextual jokes I usually never get around here... :(

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 08:23 AM
Sorry, the word "IF" should be in there.


Sorry, IF we have a son, he's not dating, either.

Terez
08-14-2008, 08:30 AM
That sounds like a sure way to guarantee a teenage boy would just take what he can get without going through all the dating business...

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 08:35 AM
It's a good way to get that response from a girl, too.



I was joking. Either way, it's stupid to be too restrictive of either gender's relationships, anyway.

Also, a good way to foster an Oedipus or Electra complex.

Terez
08-14-2008, 09:21 AM
It's a good way to get that response from a girl, too.
I think to a lesser extent, though, since teenage girls are more romantically inclined, in general.

Also, a good way to foster an Oedipus or Electra complex.
Eww!

DeiwosTheSkyGod
08-14-2008, 10:05 AM
Also, a good way to foster an Oedipus or Electra complex.

Yeah, definitely ditch that plan.

Realnow
08-14-2008, 11:02 AM
Have you ever thought of trying a plan thats like 60 bucks a month (with features) that lets you call from like 6pm on unlimited and on weekends, plus about 200 min otherwise. For 60 bucks you'd prob get 2k or something plus extra for certain times as well.

Yuri33
08-14-2008, 11:24 AM
I think to a lesser extent, though, since teenage girls are more romantically inclined, in general.

That doesn't prevent the occasional teenager from hooking with a 45-year-old for a one night stand though, right? :)

Davian93
08-14-2008, 11:26 AM
Umm...I've known alot of teenage girls that were far more promiscuous than teenage boys...just sayin'. And then there was the phenomenan known as "barracks whores" in the Army...most girls (many 18 and 19) that lived in the barracks had been with almost every guy there...it wasn't about romance I think.

Terez
08-14-2008, 11:27 AM
That doesn't prevent the occasional teenager from hooking with a 45-year-old for a one night stand though, right? :) Well, I was talking more about minors. I was already jaded at the age of 19. :D

Umm...I've known alot of teenage girls that were far more promiscuous than teenage boys...just sayin'.
Really? I think people just make a bigger deal out of it when it's a girl.

Brita
08-14-2008, 11:39 AM
And then there was the phenomenan known as "barracks whores" in the Army...most girls (many 18 and 19) that lived in the barracks had been with almost every guy there...it wasn't about romance I think.

...... :( I mean obviously there will be hook ups here and there, but there is no way every girl is romantically attracted to every guy- definitely something else going on, and it doesn't sound good.

Mort
08-14-2008, 11:46 AM
...... :( I mean obviously there will be hook ups here and there, but there is no way every girl is romantically attracted to every guy- definitely something else going on, and it doesn't sound good.

Yeah, not good at all, maybe they really like sex, they have to be stopped! :)

Terez
08-14-2008, 11:48 AM
I won't claim that female teenagers like sex any less than the boys. Just that they're more "romantically inclined" in general - that is, more inclined to seek sex through "meaningful relationships", or what passes for them. It's a generalization, so not true for every case, but I still think true in general.

Brita
08-14-2008, 12:04 PM
I won't claim that female teenagers like sex any less than the boys. Just that they're more "romantically inclined" in general - that is, more inclined to seek sex through "meaningful relationships", or what passes for them. It's a generalization, so not true for every case, but I still think true in general.

Yep- I agree. I think there are girls who just like to have a "good time", but they are the minority. Mort- I would bet anything that these "Barracks' Whores" feel pressured for whatever reason and are going to have unpleasant memories and maybe more from the experience.

I have friends who have been through this in their teenage years and now have difficulty enjoying sex with their husbands because of the memories. Yet most men don't carry those ramifications with them, even if they do have unpleasant memories as well. And admit it, most guys won't call any sexual encounter unpleasant- where you know that women will. It is much more emotional for women than men- and I am sure there are many good biological reasons for that.

So as much as you would like to dream of sexy army lasses just enjoying as much sex as they can- that ain't reality.

I'd be interested to see if the other girls on this board agree. I would guess not one girl on this board read that sentence and thought "Oh, good for those girls for nailing all those guys- that must have been fun." I would guess we all read that and went "Ewww" inside.

Ishara
08-14-2008, 12:27 PM
I read it and went ooohhhhh. There's a difference between having and enjoying sex and having sex because you feel insignificant without it - you know? I'm betting those barracks girls had little to no self esteem. Not because of the sex per se, but using sex to make up for it.

Brita
08-14-2008, 12:31 PM
Exactly. A girl can have a one night stand and enjoy it. She could have many partners throughout her life and enjoy them all. But not the whole barracks, or football team or chess club or whatever...that is something different.

Terez
08-14-2008, 12:31 PM
I read it and went ooohhhhh. There's a difference between having and enjoying sex and having sex because you feel insignificant without it - you know? I'm betting those barracks girls had little to no self esteem. Not because of the sex per se, but using sex to make up for it. I agree with that. I think that the term "slut" is bandied about far too often, and used in reference to girls who simply enjoy sex and don't necessarily require that romantic attachment to enjoy it. But when it gets to the point of being a "barracks whore" type, then there's almost certainly a self-esteem issue involved (and I would say the same about guys who do similar things, though the guys usually get labeled as "studs" rather than "sluts", and when guys are referred to as "sluts", the word doesn't carry the same connotations as it does when applied to a girl).

Mort
08-14-2008, 12:40 PM
Where these women actually military or where they just "visiting"? I took it to mean they were military anyway.

I know a lot or most - I have no numbers on it, of women have a different feeling towards sex than men do. My reasoning is that maybe women who join up to the army/navy/whatever have a different view than most others, let's call it a more of a "guy view". Or they get a more guy view from hanging around a bunch of guys.

And this might come back to haunt them later, or maybe it doesn't. I think the problem is that they are later called whores than anything else, not because they had sex with ten other guys.

I have friends who work in the airforce and there are quite a few women working there, 20ish, and they are probably some of the most secure women I know. Take no crap etc. At the same time some of them can sleep around more than most girls, and they seem to be fine about it.

The only thing I'm unsure of know is if I am generalising too much about my own "findings". Scientifically I definetly am, Theorylandly... who knows? :D

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 12:44 PM
A barracks whore has not joined the Armed Forces, Mort. She's basically living with these guys so that she won't have to live in a place of her own.

My sister knew of several of these women when she was in the navy.

Mort
08-14-2008, 12:50 PM
A barracks whore has not joined the Armed Forces, Mort. She's basically living with these guys so that she won't have to live in a place of her own.

My sister knew of several of these women when she was in the navy.

Oh, how perfectly vulgar.

Why is it even allowed? Okay, keep the guys happy, but isn't that what brothels are for? :)

Brita
08-14-2008, 12:53 PM
I wonder how cultural differences between NA and EU play into this as well...

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 12:57 PM
The effort to not let the chick be noticed is nearly a barracks-wide endeavor.

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 01:21 PM
It's probably not allowed. It's more of a sneaky thing. I know I got kicked out of the barracks a few times. :p

I've met girls who fit into the category of "barracks whore". Some did it for the reason Gil mentioned, some because they liked sex (or so it seemed) and some were obviously insecure. Others were trying to get pregnant and find a man to take care of them. (What's better than a man in the service, who if you marry, the government takes care of you, too?)

I dated one guy, we were off again on again. There's a lot of drinking and partying in the barracks. At least on Ft. Hood. I got kicked out 3 times in one night! First time CQ came up to the room and said it was time for the party to be over, anyone not supposed to be in the barracks needed to leave. So we all left, then went to a ground floor room, where the party had been moved to and crawled in the window. Differnt guy on CQ, busted up that party, told us to leave. So, then while we were sneaking back in, again. We got caught! This time, it was the first guy on CQ who told us to go home, and he escorted us to our cars and watched us leave.

There were a few other times, but that was the only night I managed 3 times! :D

I've seen girls go from one guy to another, dating each for a few weeks, I've seen girls skip the dating altogether and just hop from bed to bed. I dating one guy, off and on. Whenever I came up, I brought friends that were easy, for his friends. Yes I know, "bad Cary". But, the girls wanted to come, specifically for some weekend action, no strings attached.

tanaww
08-14-2008, 01:37 PM
The other variation is the girl that is actually in the service. Some want to get knocked up to get out of being deployed. Others are just easy.

I have heard rumors of some girls making a tidy sum while overseas with their "second job" as well... It's only illegal if you get caught ;)

Weird Harold
08-14-2008, 01:43 PM
I would bet anything that these "Barracks' Whores" feel pressured for whatever reason and are going to have unpleasant memories and maybe more from the experience.

"Barracks Whores" are the military's equivalent of rock star groupies in one sense, and the modern equivalent of camp followers in another.

In my experience, it is harder to fend off a barracks girl than it is to pressure her into doing anything -- for the they are there because they want to be there or, in many cases, because they feel safe there.

Every case is different, but for the few to be found in USAF barracks stateside, being in a military barracks was almost a sexual fetish in itself. From the few conversations on the subject with members of other services, the sexual fetish component is even stronger because it combines, forbidden precincts, public sex and dangerous lovers all in one package.

Roughly the same phenomenon can be found at Fire Stations and, to a lesser extent, police stations or anywhere else that "men in uniform who do dangerous jobs" congregate.

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 01:44 PM
hehe, didn't think about that! Jeez when my guy friends asked me to bring my girl friends, and my girl friends were eager, for some unattached action...dang it! I coulda been a madam, who delivers! :p

You know, and normally when they were looking for unattached action, they became attached. Go figure! Now, that I think about it, it was the guy who became attached first! Darn boys! ;)

Terez
08-14-2008, 01:44 PM
Roughly the same phenomenon can be found at Fire Stations and, to a lesser extent, police stations or anywhere else that "men in uniform who do dangerous jobs" congregate.This is starting to remind me of Rowan Mayfair.

Brita
08-14-2008, 01:50 PM
To WH- I had assumed they were in the army.

Now to sneak in to fulfill a fetish or fantasy I can see- it was the "sleep with the whole Barracks" phrase that gets me.

But then I prefer to be chased than to do the chasing- to each their own ;)

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 01:51 PM
Okay, I wikied Rowan Mayfair. Yuck! Is the story good, cause all the incest and whatnot to make her who she is, is...disgusting!

Weird Harold
08-14-2008, 01:55 PM
hehe, didn't think about that! Jeez when my guy friends asked me to bring my girl friends, and my girl friends were eager, for some unattached action...dang it! I coulda been a madam, who delivers! :p

You know, and normally when they were looking for unattached action, they became attached. Go figure! Now, that I think about it, it was the guy who became attached first! Darn boys! ;)
Stateside, you wouldn't have gotten a lot of business -- enough to pay for college, but not much more.

The going rate for a "donut dolly" (aka red cross volunteer who delivered coffee, donuts and conversation) in Vietnam was one month's combat pay -- proportional to rank, and they were NOT interested in lowly E3 maintenance techs or any enlisted ranks at all. They were, however, very frequent vistors to officer territory.

Rumors persist of donut dollies who returned from a six-month tour of Southeast Asia and retired on the interest from simple savings accounts.

Gilshalos Sedai
08-14-2008, 01:58 PM
The World's Oldest Profession.

Davian93
08-14-2008, 01:58 PM
To WH- I had assumed they were in the army.

Now to sneak in to fulfill a fetish or fantasy I can see- it was the "sleep with the whole Barracks" phrase that gets me.

But then I prefer to be chased than to do the chasing- to each their own ;)

I was actually referring to females in the army...not the "camp followers" as WH was talking about...though there's a bunch of them as well...and no "pressure" is ever applied espically in the latter's case as they can't even get on base without help from someone. My point was that both men and women have sex just for sex in equal amounts.

Weird Harold
08-14-2008, 02:00 PM
To WH- I had assumed they were in the army.

Now to sneak in to fulfill a fetish or fantasy I can see- it was the "sleep with the whole Barracks" phrase that gets me.

But then I prefer to be chased than to do the chasing- to each their own ;)
That sleep with the whole barracks is part of the fantasy for many of them.

Different strokes for different folks and every girl has her own reasons but the ones I crossed paths with or knew about weren't being forced unless it was by their own inner demons.

Terez
08-14-2008, 02:04 PM
Okay, I wikied Rowan Mayfair. Yuck! Is the story good, cause all the incest and whatnot to make her who she is, is...disgusting! I think that The Witching Hour was probably the best book Anne Rice wrote, and Rowan was actually a likable character. She just had a thing for men in uniform, especially those who had to risk their lives on a regular basis. But she ended up with an architect. :D

The incest was just history in her family, not something she ever engaged in. The witchcraft in her family was something she tried desperately to avoid. Her abilities, she also tried desperately to avoid.

My point was that both men and women have sex just for sex in equal amounts.
I still disagree with that.

Brita
08-14-2008, 02:16 PM
Different strokes for different folks and every girl has her own reasons but the ones I crossed paths with or knew about weren't being forced unless it was by their own inner demons.

That is exactly what I mean....

The guys will take the opportunity and then label her a "Barracks Whore"- the whole thing still makes me shudder- whether the girls insist they enjoy it or not.

But I won't argue it any further.

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 02:18 PM
I think that The Witching Hour was probably the best book Anne Rice wrote, and Rowan was actually a likable character. She just had a thing for men in uniform, especially those who had to risk their lives on a regular basis. But she ended up with an architect. :D

The incest was just history in her family, not something she ever engaged in. The witchcraft in her family was something she tried desperately to avoid. Her abilities, she also tried desperately to avoid.

Oh, then maybe it would be a good read. Wiki doesn't make it sound like that.


I still disagree with that.

I don't. I think societies views inhibits womans natural urges, and make them feel they are wrong to have them. Which accounts for all kinds of emotional turmoil, when they follow those urges. Those society views also cause the trouble you brought up earlier, about woman who like sex being labled sluts, and men being labled studs.

We are human, sex feels good (at least when you're doing it right, and still pretty good even when you aren't :p ). Biologically we need to mate to keep our species alive. We are made to enjoy sex. Society, tells us how to feel about such things.

Terez
08-14-2008, 02:27 PM
I think societies views inhibits womans natural urges, and make them feel they are wrong to have them.
That's essentially my point, you know. It may be that gender has nothing to do with the urge for sex with no strings attached from a purely biological standpoint, but socialization is a different story.

Davian is saying that, in practice, women go for sex with no strings attached just as often as men. It's not true, at least where I'm from - especially when we're talking about teenagers. Grown women are better able to shake off the socialization than teenage girls.

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 02:35 PM
ahh, I see what you're saying. Yes, the way the world stands today (well at least here in the US) Dav's statement is not true, do to the influence of society.

ETA: actually I'm no expert so i can't really just say "Dav's statement is not true", but I suspect that it isn't.

However, if not due to those influences, I think the desire would be proportionate in men and women. Not at the same age though. Men are more interested in sex when they are younger, and women when they are older. That makes sense in a biological way. Younger men have more stamina (generally) and older woman are more mature and can take care of the offspring. Again, just biologically saying. Nothing to do with societies views.

Terez
08-14-2008, 02:46 PM
Hmm, I dunno about that. Women mature biologically much earlier than men, and I don't know about you, but I started getting very interested in sex at about age 12, if not before. Probably only socialization kept me from acting on it.

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 02:55 PM
I was interested then, too. I can say for certain that, now I want it a whole lot more. That started just before I turned 30. :D

ETA: Not sure, about older men, really. But I know a lot of boys in Junior High and High School, who should not have been wearing sweat pants! ;)

I think when you hit puberty, there's a period of time when you are going through all the changes, that you have a stronger sexual desire. Then after puberty, maybe you cool down a bit. I don't really know :p

What I said about the amount of desire at different ages, made sense to me. No idea if it's been scientifically proven or not.

Terez
08-14-2008, 03:07 PM
I was interested then, too. I can say for certain that, now I want it a whole lot more. That started just before I turned 30. :D I think that the late sexual prime of women has more to do with the socialization than biology. Girls want it just as much when they hit puberty, though it's not as visible as it is with boys who can't control their penis. :D The female sexual revolution comes later in life because it takes a while to shake the social stigma.

My, how this thread has meandered...

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 03:18 PM
My, how this thread has meandered...

Yes, it has... I was thinking the same thing. A few posts ago I was thinking of one of Tru's emotes:


http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g7/tworiverswoman/thpiratesmile.gif

Terez
08-14-2008, 03:20 PM
Well, Hopper's problem seems to be resolved, at least. :D

Cary Sedai
08-14-2008, 03:21 PM
And we've touched on possible future ones! Yay for Theorylanders!

Davian93
08-14-2008, 03:24 PM
They've done studies that show that the whole "Women are more romantic...don't just have sex theory" is BS...If I have time I'll google it and post it.

Sei'taer
08-14-2008, 04:06 PM
I
ETA: Not sure, about older men, really. But I know a lot of boys in Junior High and High School, who should not have been wearing sweat pants! ;)


LMAO...I never ever wore sweats...BIG no no.

Zaela Sedai
08-14-2008, 05:07 PM
I Wonder what wolfie boy will think about his Kidlets thread ending up here. LOL

Mort
08-14-2008, 05:12 PM
I Wonder what wolfie boy will think about his Kidlets thread ending up here. LOL

If he hasn't figured out after all these years that this would happen as soon as he posted a thread here, he never will :)

tanaww
08-14-2008, 05:51 PM
boys who can't control their penis.

And how are they different from MEN who can't control their penis?

Zaela Sedai
08-14-2008, 06:43 PM
The only general difference is usually you don;t see men walking around it full salute LOL

Hopper
08-14-2008, 07:14 PM
I Wonder what wolfie boy will think about his Kidlets thread ending up here. LOL

You guys are doing my heart a world of good making me think that my almost-13-year old step daughter is thinking of sex. Excuse me while I go put a padlock on her door and barbed wire around her windows.

Terez
08-14-2008, 07:45 PM
Get Dapple to take her shopping for sex toys. That will keep her away from the boys...

Davian93
08-14-2008, 07:50 PM
Get Dapple to take her shopping for sex toys. That will keep her away from the boys...


LOL...I'm just imagining Hopper's face right now.

Mort
08-15-2008, 04:57 AM
LOL...I'm just imagining Hopper's face right now.


Moahahhaha! We are here to enlighten and corrupt after all :)

Hopper
08-15-2008, 05:13 AM
Get Dapple to take her shopping for sex toys. That will keep her away from the boys...

Now you're just trying to get Children's Services to visit my house, aren't you?

Terez
08-15-2008, 07:48 AM
I think you could take that one to court and win. :D

Ishara
08-15-2008, 09:15 AM
They've done studies that show that the whole "Women are more romantic...don't just have sex theory" is BS... And they've also done studies to prove the opposite. I think most of us are discussing it from our own points of view as opposed to "what is right and true according to studies." The fact is, people view sex according to the way they were socialized. Puritans viewed sex differently than we do who view sex differently than Iron Age people.

Terez
08-15-2008, 09:55 AM
And they've also done studies to prove the opposite. I think most of us are discussing it from our own points of view as opposed to "what is right and true according to studies." The fact is, people view sex according to the way they were socialized. Puritans viewed sex differently than we do who view sex differently than Iron Age people. Exactly. I think everyone knows I live in the Bible Belt, and I was raised here. I was also raised "middle class", meaning that we were poor because my parents' money all went to the nice house and car, with almost nothing left over. The actual lower class in the Bible Belt has a different socialization to offer than my upbringing did, but we were all thrown in together at school, and I gauge my opinion on what I've observed there, and also on what I've observed working with the poverty class the last 14 years.