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eboughey
01-31-2012, 01:49 PM
What do you think is the funniest comment in this dark but very humorous at times epic?

Gathering Storm:

Mine is what Mat said to Verin when she found him close to Trustair and asked why he hadn't asked her where she got the pictures of him and Perrin:

"You're Aes Sedai" Matt said "I figured you... saidared it."

Mat says the dangdest things. keeps me smiling almost the whole way through his chapters!

Tomp
01-31-2012, 02:25 PM
I like what Mat said to the three girls in Tar Valon (TDR)

"One pretty woman means fun at the dance. Two pretty women mean trouble in the house. Three pretty women mean run for the hills."

Crispin's Crispian
01-31-2012, 02:31 PM
Of course, I always liked Lan in New Spring:

"An Aes Sedai, if she really was one, and a Cairhienin? There could be no worse combination."

Fin
01-31-2012, 04:50 PM
i believe it comes from crossroads of twilight but my favorite quote in the series is
" Maybe Mat being ta'veren had helped, but for enough gold, Valan Luca would help kidnap the Dark One. "

The Unreasoner
01-31-2012, 05:53 PM
I forget where it is, but one of my favorite scenes was when LTT is laughing at Rand when Rand thinks merchants resist change.

I also thought of the Cairhienin/Aes Sedai thing Crispin noted, and the Aiel reaction to Rand's Two Rivers joke ("It must have something to do with the water")

Lupusdeusest
02-01-2012, 03:06 AM
I've always liked:
And as for words of wisdom, the first she had heard out of him had been a fervent promise never to throw a rock at anyone again, offered after she had paddled his young backside for it.

and

If you fell head first into a pigsty, you'd try to convince everybody you did it on purpose.

but especially the entire segment when Uno tries not to swear in front of Nynaeve - Oh, I do remember you. The one with the fla- the mouth. Ragan thought you could skin and butcher a blo- bull at ten paces with your tongue. Chaena and Nangu thought fifty.

Zombie Sammael
02-01-2012, 06:17 AM
That point when you've reread the series four or five times and you think you're starting to get Aiel humour.

I also like Mat's speech about the boots in TOM. It's great. I think Brandon's Mat is a little different from RJ's Mat, and Brandon's is a little more obviously humorous. Of course, with both authors, Mat is the most entertaining character in the series (so put him with the most boring for a book or two and you're guaranteed mediocrity! ...I'm looking at you, Valan Luca).

Abbaaddon
02-01-2012, 06:23 AM
The boot thing also remembers me of a speech Vimaire gave in Terry Pratchet's Discworld series, and I found it rather nice.
Another one is when Mat tells Joline : "Now that killed the goat" and starts slapping her butt =)

Toad
02-01-2012, 03:14 PM
"I'm going to keep bloody gambling! Bloody, bloody gambling and drinking! Where's my bloody drink? Anyone want to gamble for it?"
Talmanes, referring to Mat after his marriage to Tuon

1eyedfool
02-01-2012, 03:32 PM
Mat's letter to Elayne, ToM: Chapter 11
"Your Royal Bloody Pain in my Back, ..."

The Unreasoner
02-01-2012, 04:56 PM
but especially the entire segment when Uno tries not to swear in front of Nynaeve - Oh, I do remember you. The one with the fla- the mouth. Ragan thought you could skin and butcher a blo- bull at ten paces with your tongue. Chaena and Nangu thought fifty.
The Nynaeve on Rand's Wisdom was awesome. Nynaeve was always one of my favorite characters. But the best part of the Nynaeve/Uno/Raan scene is at the end, when Ragan 'strongly agrees with all the things that were said but sincerely doubted the wisdom in saying them'
That point when you've reread the series four or five times and you think you're starting to get Aiel humour.
I actually truly believe that even RJ didn't fully get Aiel humor.
I also like Mat's speech about the boots in TOM. It's great.
Yeggh. Really? I love BS, and am truly thankful for what he has done for WoT. He's a smart guy and a good writer. But his Mat is worse than his Cadsuane. It's like some character out of a saturday morning cartoon. It's so... I don't know. Definitely trying to hard. And caricaturish.

Let's look at examples from this thread:
Sanderson's Mat
"You're Aes Sedai" Matt said "I figured you... saidared it."

Your Royal Bloody Pain in my Back

"I'm going to keep bloody gambling! Bloody, bloody gambling and drinking! Where's my bloody drink? Anyone want to gamble for it?"
Talmanes, referring to Mat after his marriage to Tuon

(I realize that last one isn't actually Mat but a caricature of him, what's sad is that there really isn't much of a difference)

Jordan's Mat
"One pretty woman means fun at the dance. Two pretty women mean trouble in the house. Three pretty women mean run for the hills."

" Maybe Mat being ta'veren had helped, but for enough gold, Valan Luca would help kidnap the Dark One. "


You see? There's no contest.


Of course, I always liked Lan in New Spring:
"An Aes Sedai, if she really was one, and a Cairhienin? There could be no worse combination."
I thought this one was interesting. I cracked up when I read it too, but I wonder if we would have found it funny if we hadn't read as much of the primary series first. I mean, if someone chose to start with NS (a dumb idea, to my mind), would they get it? I doubt it. There might be some stuff in NS that puts it into context, but I doubt it is enough to really make it a side-splitter alone.

Toss the dice
02-01-2012, 05:11 PM
I've always thought someone reading the series for the first time should wait to read NS until they've completed the first 3 books at the very least. Like your Aes Sedai-Cairhienin example, there are multiple instances where it would be better to have read the main books first. However, by far the most important reason NEVER to read NS first is because it would absolutely ruin the mood, questions, and suspense in TEotW, when it comes to the "strangers" in Emond's Field. Read NS first and you're fucked.

Hmm, funny comments. Here's a few offhand.

1. Bashere talking about his old insane general and how he chopped down a grove of oaks because they were looking at him. And then proceeded to give the oration.

2. Mat's pov when he runs back to his room the night he escapes Ebou Dar. How he stumbles and shatters a vase and limps as fast as any man ever had. Good, funny imagery there.

3. "...and try not to eat the table." - Thom to Mat

4. "The Light burn me!" - Thom to Mat when he sees Mat opening a firework.

fdsaf3
02-01-2012, 09:41 PM
I love the scene in Dragon Reborn towards the end when Mat is trying to break into the Stone of Tear. He runs into the Aiel on the roofs and Julian Sandar. He makes the comment (something like) "there are a lot of bloody people on the rooftops tonight".

I literally laughed out loud the last time I read it. So funny.

eboughey
02-01-2012, 10:29 PM
Mat's letter to Elayne, ToM: Chapter 11
"Your Royal Bloody Pain in my Back, ..."

Yes I like his letter to Elayne as well.

eboughey
02-01-2012, 10:33 PM
I love the scene in Dragon Reborn towards the end when Mat is trying to break into the Stone of Tear. He runs into the Aiel on the roofs and Julian Sandar. He makes the comment (something like) "there are a lot of bloody people on the rooftops tonight".

I literally laughed out loud the last time I read it. So funny.

and I just laughed out loud just now reading the post.

I truly love this series and I enjoy seeing a bit of lightheartedness throughout. Nynaeve is pretty funny at times and then just annoying at others, but they put the breaks in there at just the right time it seems to me.

eboughey
02-01-2012, 10:36 PM
I forgot in the beginning it was pretty funny how Rand, Mat and Perrin always said that one of the other ones new more about women.

finnssss
02-02-2012, 12:54 AM
ToM Chptr 7

When Byar is talking to Galad about the Two Rivers and Perrin raising an army of farmers. That they shouldn't be dismissed, that some of them are skilled in the staff or the bow.


"I am well aware." Galad said flatly


BS may not always be a subtle as RJ in his humour but he still gets 'em in there.

Mort
02-02-2012, 03:10 AM
I agree that RJ is more subtle with his humor than BS, for the most part.

RJ on the other hand with his subtle humor can sometimes be a bit dry. Either it lands on the side of brilliant with a dialogue that is just right, or it lands on the side with the guy wearing a tweed jacket, thinking he's more funny than he really is :)

Toad
02-02-2012, 03:36 AM
Mat's analogy about gambling with women while they use blank dice and see whatever pips they want has me laughing every time I read it.

Tercel
02-02-2012, 04:03 AM
I find it funny when Mat hears the True Source is cleansed and he pats himself to see if he feels different. It's kind of funny on a second level - because I think Mat's response is a good one and none of the other characters seem to take the Cleansing properly seriously like Mat does.

Another humorous (to me) Mat line that I think of often in an ironic sense of humour: "Light, he had heard stories of paving stones attacking people. If a man could not trust the rocks under his feet, what could he trust?" (I live in Christchurch, and we've had about 2000 feelable earthquakes in the past year and a half.)

Tomp
02-02-2012, 06:45 AM
When Mat tells the tale of his experience playing Maiden's kiss in chapter 2 in TSR.
The maidens have all their spears at his throat and he says
"I could have shaved with one sneeze"

JOS
02-02-2012, 11:02 AM
I have always liked when Rand agrees to allow the Maidens to "carry his Honor" to Alcair Dal, and they get him plastered on oosquai:

When he accepted, they made him go through that ritual of "Remember honor" again, this time with some drink called oosquai, made from zemai, drinking to the bottom of a small silver cup with each of them. Ten Maidens; ten little cups. The stuff looked like faintly brown-tinged water, tasted almost like it-and was stronger than double-distilled brandy. He had not been able to walk straight after, and they had got him to bed, laughing at him, no matter how he protested, as much as he could with all of them tickling him so he could barely breathe for laughing himself...

...How could you possibly look ten women in the face and ask why they had gotten you drunk and made a game of taking your clothes off and putting you to bed?

The imagery in this scene has always been entertaining, and there aren't many instances of "Silly Rand" throughout the series.

Landro
02-02-2012, 11:26 AM
I think it was Rhuarc who said

'The creator made women to please the eye and trouble the mind'

Zombie Sammael
02-04-2012, 10:20 AM
I have always liked when Rand agrees to allow the Maidens to "carry his Honor" to Alcair Dal, and they get him plastered on oosquai:



The imagery in this scene has always been entertaining, and there aren't many instances of "Silly Rand" throughout the series.

Off topic, but I think this highlights one of the saddest things about Dark Rand: from the very beginning it's clear that there's quite a sweet, playful young man lost beneath the layers of destiny that make up the Dragon Reborn. It's probably the only thing that makes the idea of Dark Rand's re-emergence palatable, to think that while Veins of Gold was a victory for the Light, the ultimate victory would be allowing Rand al'Thor to be the person he wants to be instead of the person he must. Perhaps realising that his first death need not be the end will give him the strength to find freedom within destiny.

77jester
02-04-2012, 09:39 PM
In the beginning of the series the wide eyed innocence of the heroes was hilarious to me.

Like when Rand was telling Thom about the Cairhienen noble women only wanting to talk about their husbands being away, but they were hinting at other things. And Thom chokes on his wine :D;):p

And when Mat was teasing Loial about Erith and Perrin said the girl that thought Mat was handsome had a face like a goat.... I always crack up at that point.

Oden
02-06-2012, 12:00 PM
I like Fain's comments of insanity. Here's an example from tGH: "Soon comes the day all shall be free. Even you, and even me. Soon comes the day all shall die. Surely you, but never I."

I also think that Lini's sayings are really amusing, especially when Elaine uses them. This is my favorite: "At my age, if I make it up, it’s still an old saying." -Lini, original

Davian93
02-06-2012, 12:08 PM
I always thought this line was pretty funny:


TITLE: Great Hunt
CHAPTER: 34 - The Wheel Weaves
Fain decided how the man was going to die. Turak looked from Fain to the Horn as placidly as if he had seen nothing.


I mean, I laughed pretty hard the first time I read that...and was massively disappointed when Fain didnt follow up by killing Turak in some horribly gruesome fashion.

eht slat meit
02-06-2012, 07:54 PM
I like Fain's comments of insanity. Here's an example from tGH: "Soon comes the day all shall be free. Even you, and even me. Soon comes the day all shall die. Surely you, but never I."


I'd forgotten that neat little piece of verse, and after looking back at the text, I have to wonder if it's true insanity or some sort prophetic verse that hints at Fain's own fate. After all, quoting some invisible character named "Mordeth" to fellow Randlanders just doesn't sound sane, but we know that he was a real person, and is a real... something else... now.

The chant itself has what looks like veiled references to the Dragon's fate, freeing men with his blood on the rocks of Shayol Ghul. But freeing men from the Shadow doesn't free Faindeth from what his other half, a monstrous corruption of man, an evil that beats counterpoint to the DO itself.

Rand's fated to die, but perhaps Fain is not, with something worse in store for him.

suttree
02-06-2012, 10:42 PM
Somewhat surprised at the people thinking TGS Mat(letter, saidared) was funny. Those are some of the most cringe worthy parts of the series for me. Doesn't even remotely fit in and feels clunky/forced.

As for comedy I always love LTT's snarky comments in tPoD during the Damona Mountains campaign against the Seanchan. One example...

tPoD
"I mean to drive the Seanchan into the sea!" Rand snapped. Light, he hadto finish them now, when he had the chance! He could not fight the Seanchan and the Forsaken and the Light alone knew who or what else, all at the same time! "I did it before, and I will again!"
Do you have the Horn of Valere hidden in your pocket this time?Lews Therin asked slyly. Rand snarled at him silently.

Davian93
02-07-2012, 07:22 AM
Somewhat surprised at the people thinking TGS Mat(letter, saidared) was funny. Those are some of the most cringe worthy parts of the series for me. Doesn't even remotely fit in and feels clunky/forced.

As for comedy I always love LTT's snarky comments in tPoD during the Damona Mountains campaign against the Seanchan. One example...

tPoD

I agree...Mat simply sounded off that entire book. The humor was so forced compared to his previous POVs.

Seeker
02-07-2012, 07:51 AM
Nynaeve: Rand al'Thor, you are-

Rand: An idiot? A blind fool A wool-headed lout in need of a sound ear boxing.

Nynaeve: Er... Yes?

Rand: All true. But I think you need some new insults.

Zombie Sammael
02-07-2012, 08:01 AM
Brandon's style of humour is clearly very different to RJ's. That's why "comic" characters like Mat play differently in TGS and TOM, and why the humour is more overt. Not a bad thing, IMO.

Brita
02-07-2012, 08:29 AM
1. Bashere talking about his old insane general and how he chopped down a grove of oaks because they were looking at him. And then proceeded to give the oration.


"Do you have any idea how long it takes to dig graves for twenty-three oak trees?"
Davram Bashere

David Selig
02-07-2012, 09:38 AM
This thread needs more Nyneave, she's the funniest character for me. So here are a few of her most hilarious moments:

"Men always seemed to think violence could solve anything. If she had had a stout stick, she would have thumped all three of them about the shoulders until they saw reason."

"She flinched as he touched her puffy eye. It was his bad luck to choose that. He would have done better to continue trying to stuff her into that red dress. “I did not like the way it looked at me in the mirror this morning, so I bit it.”"

"Elayne stopped to muffle a yawn behind her hand. How could the woman manage to look pretty yawning, with her hair a mess and a red wrinkle from a pillow marring one cheek? That was a secret Aes Sedai ought to investigate. "

(When Birgitte had pissed her off) - "Gaidal Cain was probably glad to get away from the woman."

I love the irony in this passage from Elayne's PoV

"Catalyn demanded. Her red dress, embroidered with broad bands of gold at the hem and on the sleeves, did not suit her coloring, especially when her plump cheeks were crimson with anger. Her chin was raised. Perhaps she wore that large enameled pin bearing Haevin’s Blue Bear where she did so she would be forced to keep her chin high and look down her nose at everyone."

Lupusdeusest
02-07-2012, 09:23 PM
"She flinched as he touched her puffy eye. It was his bad luck to choose that. He would have done better to continue trying to stuff her into that red dress. “I did not like the way it looked at me in the mirror this morning, so I bit it.”"



I chortle aloud for ages whenever I read that line, regardless of where I am. That is saying something, from me.

Maesterbaevern
02-08-2012, 01:26 PM
I agree that RJ is more subtle with his humor than BS, for the most part.

RJ on the other hand with his subtle humor can sometimes be a bit dry. Either it lands on the side of brilliant with a dialogue that is just right, or it lands on the side with the guy wearing a tweed jacket, thinking he's more funny than he really is :)
Hear, hear!

Green Man 22
02-09-2012, 11:32 AM
I always thought this line was pretty funny:

TITLE: Great Hunt
CHAPTER: 34 - The Wheel Weaves
Fain decided how the man was going to die. Turak looked from Fain to the Horn as placidly as if he had seen nothing.

I mean, I laughed pretty hard the first time I read that...and was massively disappointed when Fain didnt follow up by killing Turak in some horribly gruesome fashion.

Wasn't he referring Huon, the High Lord's servant that slapped him? At least that is how I read it.

When Rand and company come into the room with the Horn, Turak says that he thought it would be Fain, since he suspected him since Huon had died mysteriously. I think Fain followed through on that quote.

Toss the dice
02-10-2012, 07:19 PM
"But you will if we can get you out of Tar Valon?" Nynaeve said intently.

"You get me out of Tar Valon, and I'll carry Elayne to her mother on my back."

Elayne's eyebrows went up, this time, and Egwene shook her head, mouthing his name with a sharp look in her eyes. Women had no sense of humor, sometimes.

(TDR - Mat, Nynaeve, Elayne)
----------------------------------------------

"No street thieves or strong-arms in Tar Valon, either, boy. When the guards take a footpad - not that many try that game here; the word spreads - but when they do, they haul him to the Tower, and whatever it is the Aes Sedai do to him, the fellow leaves Tar Valon the next day as wide-eyed as a goosed girl."

(TDR - Thom, Mat)
----------------------------------------------

Morgase drew an unsteady breath. "Tell me, Thom Grinwell, did my daughter look well when you saw her?"

"Yes, my Queen. She smiled, and laughed, and showed a saucy tongue - I mean...."

Morgase laughed softly at the look on his face. "Do not be afraid, young man. Elayne does have a saucy tongue, far too often for her own good. I am happy she is well."

(TDR - Morgase, Mat) (Too bad Elayne wasn't a fly on the wall for that one)
------------------------------------------

The Aiel had one of the books open and was reading. Some sort of essays, Mat thought. Who would have thought an Aiel would read books? Who'd have thought an Aiel could bloody read?

Rhuarc glanced in his direction, all cold blue eyes and level stare. Mat looked away hastily, before the Aiel could read his thoughts on his face. At least he is not veiled, thank the Light! Burn me, that Aviendha nearly took my head off when I asked her if she could do any dances without spears.

(TDR - Mat, Rhuarc)
----------------------------------------------

"Don't fight over me," he said. Tugging his coat was not making anyone let go. "There's enough to go around."

Five sets of eyes made him wish he had kept his mouth shut. Aes Sedai had no sense of humor.

(ACoS - Mat, Aes Sedai)
------------------------------------------------

Before long, Nynaeve was draped over the railing, losing her breakfast while Lan held her. That reminded Mat of his own belly; tucking his hat under his arm so it could not blow away, he pulled out the wedge of cheese.

(ACoS - Mat)

Seeker
02-13-2012, 08:31 PM
Somewhat surprised at the people thinking TGS Mat(letter, saidared) was funny. Those are some of the most cringe worthy parts of the series for me. Doesn't even remotely fit in and feels clunky/forced.

Really? I thought Mat was hilarious in TGS! When I read "saidared" for the first time, I laughed so hard that I couldn't start reading again for ten minutes. I had to get it all out of my system.

“You don't have a sick aunt!”

Lupusdeusest
02-13-2012, 10:44 PM
Really? I thought Mat was hilarious in TGS! When I read "saidared" for the first time, I laughed so hard that I couldn't start reading again for ten minutes. I had to get it all out of my system.

“You don't have a sick aunt!”

I kept thinking I was reading Warbreaker, or one of the early Shallan passages in TWoK.

LadyFiona
02-23-2012, 02:24 PM
When Mat gets indignant at Berelain for ignoring him as she makes her way to Perrin's room in the Stone. He confronts her and says some stuff including "If I pinch your bottom, you may slap my face..."

She stops, looks him over and he hears her mumble "too much like me" then continues on leaving him bewildered.

Oh, and in DR I think, Nynaeve names her horse Gaidin. She talks to it and tells him what a good boy is is, unlike his namesake.


Personally, Mat's letter to Elayne brought mirthful tears to my eyes. It may not be the way RJ would have done, but it was hilarious nonetheless.

Heinz
02-23-2012, 04:27 PM
When Mat gets indignant at Berelain for ignoring him as she makes her way to Perrin's room in the Stone.

Personally, Mat's letter to Elayne brought mirthful tears to my eyes. It may not be the way RJ would have done, but it was hilarious nonetheless.

What I find especially funny about that exchange now is knowing Berelain's point of view, and what she thought the Dragon suggested/promised to her regarding a marriage-tie to the Dragon via one of his friends.

And I also enjoyed Mat's letter. Like many, Mat has been one of my favorite characters for a while, possibly top favorite. Sometimes I like Sanderson's Mat, sometimes not. The letter was a good occasion, along with the sweet buns for Joline (even if an old joke).