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Davian93
09-04-2008, 06:43 PM
Carmel Dads Club bans first names on kids' team jerseys
Carmel youth sports league changes policy to help guard against sexual predators


By Dan McFeely

A CARMEL, Ind. -- Concerned about protecting children from potential sexual predators, the Carmel Dads Club has banned the use of first names and nicknames on the back of team jerseys.

"We did it for safety," said Mike McGinley, president of the organization, which oversees nearly a dozen children's sports and 12,000 young athletes.

A parent's anxiety led to the change.

***Super Mom to the Rescue!!!***

"She raised the concern about someone coming up to a kid and saying, 'Hi, Mary' or 'Hi, Jimmy,' and that might lead the youngster to believe that they knew them," he said.

***Because kids are THAT stupid, right?***

The decision, made in mid-August, came too late for fall sports, so teams that have already printed their uniforms for football and soccer are exempt and do not need to order new ones. But the change will go into effect for winter and spring sports.

Roger Levesque, the chairman of the Criminal Justice department at Indiana University, said that, at first blush, the move might appear to be "unwarranted paranoia."

***Ya think?***

"In some ways it is, and in others it is not," he said. "The vast majority of children are maltreated and harmed by people who already know them. On the other hand, offenders who harm children who are initially strangers to them do rely on establishing contact, and there are few things as effective as knowing someone's first name to get their attention."

***Statistically most offenders are people known to the kid already...you know like family members***
McGinley said parents have the option of having a child's surname printed on the jersey, which helps coaches match names and faces. But, he said, anyone who fears a potential lack of privacy has the option of leaving the back of the child's uniform blank.

Previously, Carmel Dads Club athletes and their families could choose any name for the back of uniforms.

McGinley said that, since the new policy was announced, he has fielded some phone calls from parents who are upset about the change.

The safety of Dads Club participants has not historically been an issue, he said, nor does it seem to be an issue elsewhere.

***So this was an unneccessary change brought on by a paranoid mommy?***

In Fishers, the S.P.O.R.T.S. organization, which oversees 10,000 kids in its youth leagues, has no written policy about uniforms, though many of its parents already avoid printing names on jerseys.

At the Indianapolis Catholic Youth Organization, most jerseys are purchased by parishes and are handed down from year to year without names.

McGinley, who made the recommendation to the Carmel Dads Club board of directors, said he researched the idea with the Carmel Police Department, which advised him that first names and nicknames on jerseys are probably not a good idea.

According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, allowing children to wear clothing or carry items in public on which their name is displayed may bring unwelcome attention from people looking for a way to start a conversation.

The agency, founded in 1984, seeks to prevent child abductions and sexual exploitation. Its Web site, www.missingkids.com, is filled with advice and guidelines for parents and the community.

According to the agency, 797,500 children younger than 18 are reported missing each year.

The average victim of an abduction: an 11-year-old girl.

McGinley, a former teacher and coach at Cathedral High School, just completed his first year as president of the Carmel Dads Club. He said the club will monitor the results of the policy change and may revisit the issue.

One of the club's many coaches, Paul McGinnis, said he thinks the move makes sense, with just one hitch.

"It is an unfortunate measure due to the fact that having names on jerseys in youth sports helps the parents get to know -- and cheer for -- the other kids on their child's team, as opposed to yelling, 'Go, number 3,' " he said.

***Those parents could be sex offenders...perhaps they should ban all parents from even attending or hold all games in maximum security facilities.***

Ivhon
09-04-2008, 06:50 PM
I got a better idea.

See, you start with this big plastic bubble, see. And it's completely impenetrable, right? So. Like no diseases can get in. Nor can people, cause anyone that would invade that bubble of safety is clearly a molester. And then you can pick and choose what books your kid reads. And of course there is no danger of pregnancy because nobody of the opposite sex can get in the bubble. So you blessedly don't have to tackle THAT bear of a discussion.

Really. Its the perfect solution to keep our kids safe.

And if you disagree with me then you clearly want the children of America to be raped and molested by AIDS terrorists from RIGHT THERE IN YOUR BACK YARD!! And should be shot, point blank, before you can harm one hair on my, your or anyone else's precious darlin'

Frenzy
09-04-2008, 07:31 PM
i bet Davian doesn't wear a seatbelt because, statistically, males aged 16-24 are more likely to die in a car accident than any other age group. So, statistically, he's perfectly safe.

Davian93
09-04-2008, 07:34 PM
i bet Davian doesn't wear a seatbelt because, statistically, males aged 16-24 are more likely to die in a car accident than any other age group. So, statistically, he's perfectly safe.

Nah...I wear a seatbelt...Come on Frenzy how is this not ridiculous? Your kid has a better chance at being struck by lightning than abducted to begin with. Throw in that most pedophiles target kids they already know (family members, neighbors, etc) and this gets even sillier.

tanaww
09-04-2008, 09:47 PM
Actually it is a proven technique of predators and I'd advise all parents not to put their children's first names on anything visible. If I need to put the kids' names in anything, it's not visible. Last names, no problem. First names, no. And I'm not a psycho helicopter mom. I'm just a mild-mannered child self-defense instructor. Also don't tell them to yell "fire" if someone grabs them (which is common teaching). They need to yell "You're not my mom! You're not my dad! Put me down!" And, if they're my kids they can feel free to add "you dirty son of a bitch".

Matoyak
09-04-2008, 10:40 PM
Actually...I see nothing wrong with this policy. It sounds like a somewhat smart move, even if it is slightly paranoid. Personally, I say that it's a smart idea. Especially if the athletic group is dealing with such large numbers. It's just basic first-level protection, and really...how often are first names printed on jersey's anyways? I've played sports (Soccer, flag football, baseball, tennis, etc) from age 5 up, and in only one sport, one year was my first name printed on it. That was in 6th grade baseball, and it was a shocker that they printed the first names, as they had never done so before. (It was also the first year I didn't get to choose the number on my jersey. Lol. I didn't get number 5 :( :P )

Sure, the mom is prolly a paranoid freak-a-zoid, but really, the policy isn't that shocking, or paranoid in nature, as it is a policy that seems to be followed by many places, even a little Podunk 2A town with only 2000 people in it (where I grew up) (Though that was more just a lack of a reason TO print first names)

Sinistrum
09-04-2008, 11:02 PM
I agree with Davian. Measures like this are just another side effect of our societies rampant paranoia with "random stranger" crime. All of the criminal statisticis I have ever come across point directly to family, friends, and acquiantances as being the most likely purps for just about any sort of crime involving personal violence.

Matoyak
09-04-2008, 11:10 PM
I agree with Davian. Measures like this are just another side effect of our societies rampant paranoia with "random stranger" crime. All of the criminal statisticis I have ever come across point directly to family, friends, and acquiantances as being the most likely purps for just about any sort of crime involving personal violence.
That's correct, but...why not take a little bit of extra caution? I mean, when most places don't even put first names on jersey's anyways due to several factors (expense, lack of a good reason to, and nowadays, "random stranger crime")

I mean...really, this is a 'Why not?' moment to me. Pick your battles. This is not something big enough to worry yourself sick over, and if it'll make parents feel safer, and possibly save lives in the process (hell, if it even saves ONE life, then it's worth it IMO) then all the better.

tworiverswoman
09-04-2008, 11:26 PM
I agree with Davian. Measures like this are just another side effect of our societies rampant paranoia with "random stranger" crime. All of the criminal statisticis I have ever come across point directly to family, friends, and acquiantances as being the most likely purps for just about any sort of crime involving personal violence.And those are the relevant words, here.

I don't understand the level of mockery you guys are putting out here. It's not a screamingly radical thing to do -- it sure as hell isn't turning them into "bubble boy" -- but it does add that small complication to a predator's approach.
797,500 children younger than 18 are reported missing each year. So, if, statistically speaking, 90% of them are abducted by someone they actually know, that leaves 79,750 to be stolen away by a stranger. This is not a small number.

Ozymandias
09-05-2008, 02:11 AM
And those are the relevant words, here.

I don't understand the level of mockery you guys are putting out here. It's not a screamingly radical thing to do -- it sure as hell isn't turning them into "bubble boy" -- but it does add that small complication to a predator's approach.
So, if, statistically speaking, 90% of them are abducted by someone they actually know, that leaves 79,750 to be stolen away by a stranger. This is not a small number.

PD - I think the point here is that of those 80,000 odd children being abducted, an infestimally small number are being taken at a little league sports event. AND, you have to remember, since its strangers taking those kids, it does almost nothing to remove the names from the jerseys. Sexual Predator X isn't thinking "oooh his nickname is 'Sparky', I'll nab him".

The stupidity of this is that if its someone the child knows, removing the name does absolutely 0 in protecting the child. And if its a stranger, what does it matter, since the guy is gonna nab the kid regardless of his name? I think what everyone else in here is saying is that these idiot parents made a decision without even the least bit of contemplation of what good it would do, and that the resulting harm it would do for community building and team bonding (which is half the point of recreational sports) far, far outweighs the non-existent value in protecting children from strangers.

Davian93
09-05-2008, 06:02 AM
Its not the policy per se that I object to but rather the thought process that led to it...I suppose I should have clarified that.

Gilshalos Sedai
09-05-2008, 07:41 AM
Must be a rather wealthy team to be able to afford to personalize the kids' jerseys. Most just put the team name on back and recycle them.


And I'm also against those sports and activities stickers you can put on the back of your car with your child's first name on them. They ran a story here a year or so ago where HPD was running into incidences where molesters were going up to kids and saying, "So your name is Tommy, huhn? You play baseball? I love baseball, what's your favorite team?" etc.

So, no. It's necessary. Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're NOT out to get you.

Davian93
09-05-2008, 07:51 AM
"So your name is Tommy, huhn? You play baseball? I love baseball, what's your favorite team?" etc.

"Noooo....its Davian....ooh can I have some of that candy?"

Brita
09-05-2008, 07:52 AM
Yep- my kids have never had names on their jersey's (or team T-shirts) and the team functions just fine, and the kids have lots of fun and the coaches have to work just a bit harder to learn all the names.

The only place a name is used here is taped onto hockey helmets- 'cause with a full face mask it can be daunting for a coach to ID the kids. And perps don't usually nab kids off the ice in a hockey arena, so I think we're OK there :).

I know what you are saying Dav- and I refuse to live in fear and force my kids to live in fear, but simple measures like these, like Matoyak said, "Why Not?".

GonzoTheGreat
09-05-2008, 08:14 AM
I know what you are saying Dav- and I refuse to live in fear and force my kids to live in fear, but simple measures like these, like Matoyak said, "Why Not?".
A good reason could be: because it distracts from the actual dangers.

I do not know whether or not that is true. But I do think I can make a neat conspiracy theory out of this:
Let's say that it is not a real danger after all. Then why do they focus on this? Could be stupidity, of course, but there may be a more sinister motive. Perhaps this is started by a couple of perverts. Perhaps, by getting everyone to think about totally harmless names on shirts, they distract attention from what the real danger is.

Now, that's rather farfetched, but a sligthly less farfetched risk is that by unthinkingly focusing on an imaginary danger you could blind yourself to a real one. In other words: what is actually a risk in this sense, what isn't, and how can you counter the real dangers?

tanaww
09-05-2008, 08:16 AM
Yep- my kids have never had names on their jersey's (or team T-shirts) and the team functions just fine, and the kids have lots of fun and the coaches have to work just a bit harder to learn all the names.

The only place a name is used here is taped onto hockey helmets- 'cause with a full face mask it can be daunting for a coach to ID the kids. And perps don't usually nab kids off the ice in a hockey arena, so I think we're OK there :).

I know what you are saying Dav- and I refuse to live in fear and force my kids to live in fear, but simple measures like these, like Matoyak said, "Why Not?".

So Brita's a hockey mom.

"know the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull?" - Sarah Palin, 9/3/2008, St. Paul, MN.

Davian93
09-05-2008, 08:22 AM
So Brita's a hockey mom.

"know the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull?" - Sarah Palin, 9/3/2008, St. Paul, MN.


One wears lipstick and the other would probably be a better VP than Palin? Though they'd have to housebreak the pitbull, it'd probably make better decisions at least.

Brita
09-05-2008, 08:25 AM
So Brita's a hockey mom.


No, I am certainly not! My husband is the hockey dad- if I had my way my son would not be in hockey- it is just too intense and competitive. I believe childhood should be as fun and free-spirited as possible. Real hockey moms despise me. I had a mom ask me to volunteer for a tournament, I explained that I couldn't and that I was already stretched with my own comittments, and she actually said "It's moms like you that ruin these events". Blech.

I told my hubby if I ever got a call like that again- we would be pulling our son from hockey. Period.

Davian93
09-05-2008, 08:28 AM
Hockey's great...I loved playing hockey...probably take it a bit more seriously in Canadia in than PA though...we had other sports too.

I'd still love to play hockey but its tough to skate when you have very limited feeling in one leg from the knee down...makes turning tough.

Brita
09-05-2008, 08:36 AM
Hockey itself is great- I like playing myself. I just wish it wasn't so serious here- it is our national obsession. If wars were fought on ice, Canada would have conquered the whole earth by now- but alas taht is only a pipe dream :p

(an aside- the Staal Brothers are actually from the rink my son plays at. Too many parents and coaches act like there are NHL scouts in every stand watching 8 year olds play. It's ridiculous)

Cary Sedai
09-05-2008, 09:40 AM
I dont' think it's that big of a deal. keep the names off, but don't think your safe because you do. All parents should teach thier children about saftey and strangers. Our future Prez has the right idea!


I'm just a mild-mannered child self-defense instructor. Also don't tell them to yell "fire" if someone grabs them (which is common teaching). They need to yell "You're not my mom! You're not my dad! Put me down!" And, if they're my kids they can feel free to add "you dirty son of a bitch".

Especially those bolded parts! :D

Sinistrum
09-05-2008, 12:10 PM
I mean...really, this is a 'Why not?

Because as Gonzo and Oz have pointed out, it creates a false sense of security. This measure is meaningless (though very easy to do which is probably the point) and yet these parents are resting on their laurels about it. It is not going to stop someone the child knows from abusing them and a stranger isn't going to be detered simply because he can't get the kids name off the back of his jersey. Doing something like this is essentially the equivalent of those toilet seat covers you see in public restrooms.

Brita
09-05-2008, 12:22 PM
and perhaps these parents are resting on their laurels about it. It is not going to stop someone the child knows from abusing them and a stranger isn't going to be detered simply because he can't get the kids name off the back of his jersey.

Nitpick- Bolded word edited by myself. You can speculate, as Gonzo did, that the parents may be content with this and - but there is no indication that in fact they are.

It is a hypothesis worth considering, and a potential consequence worth discussing, but by no means is it fact.

Frenzy
09-05-2008, 12:35 PM
This measure is meaningless (though very easy to do which is probably the point) and yet these parents are resting on their laurels about it.
If they are they're stupid. Just because you provide one safety layer doesn't mean you stop looking for other dangers. Because there are ALWAYS other dangers. As a parent you're always on alert for potential dangers, both big AND small. i've heard about one study that compares a new parent's vigilism to post-traumatic stress disorder. Sounds far-fetched, but if you think about it it actually fits.

Now, just because you see a danger doesn't mean you immediately squeltch it. i've watched my kids get into dangerous situations and let them do it, just to see how they reacted and if they could get themselves out of it. So i've let them get bumps and bruises and lost and such. Doesn't mean i'm not there to haul them out if they get in over their heads.

But no matter how hyper-vigilant i am, i cannot always be there. i still have nightmares about the time my son wandered off at the Farmers' Market. That was the worst 10 minutes of my life. Fortunately a lot of the patrons stopped what they were doing and helped me find him.

Crispin's Crispian
09-05-2008, 12:36 PM
I have to agree with Gil, though--how often do you see kids teams with personalized jerseys? Seems really rare to me, just because every year you have to have new ones made, especially with kids growing out of them.

Besides, one of the objectives of team sports is to make kids feel less special and to submit to the will of the collective. At least until the coaches find the superstar they can exploit and publicize.

Brita
09-05-2008, 12:39 PM
Wow- you're almost as cynical as Dav!

And Frenzy- my 7 yr old daughter got lost at the Mall of America of all frickin places! She did the right thing though and we found her in 5 eternally long minutes.

It was a good lesson for all the kids with us on what to do when lost.

Crispin's Crispian
09-05-2008, 12:43 PM
The apparent divide in this debate is interesting.

I look at it rather like preemptive warfare. You know someone is out there looking to abuct kids--why not take a simple precaution to make it a little harder? Especially when that precaution doesn't really cost any money and doesn't do any harm to anyone.

As a parent you're always on alert for potential dangers, both big AND small. i've heard about one study that compares a new parent's vigilism to post-traumatic stress disorder

We just moved into a bigger house, and it's really hard to hear the kids (who are upstairs) at bedtime (when we are downstairs). We broke out the baby monitor again, just because we're so used to being able to hear them down the hall. Something about becoming a parent changes you. I now check every lock on every door every night, at least once. It really only takes the thought of your child being abucted to make you paranoid. It's the scariest thing you can imagine. Seriously.

Crispin's Crispian
09-05-2008, 12:46 PM
Wow- you're almost as cynical as Dav!

And Frenzy- my 7 yr old daughter got lost at the Mall of America of all frickin places! She did the right thing though and we found her in 5 eternally long minutes.

It was a good lesson for all the kids with us on what to do when lost.
It was a joke. Oh well.


As for kids getting lost, so far that's only happened to me once. My daughter disappeared from the house when some contractors were working there with all the doors open. I searched for 10 minutes inside and out, and even had the contractors on bikes riding around the block. I was on the phone describing her to the police when she walked out of our bedroom, where she was had fallen asleep behind some stuff in the closet.

Brita
09-05-2008, 12:54 PM
It was a joke. Oh well.


Silly- I was joking too! See how important the emoticons are? I should have added a tongue sticking out face or at least a smile I guess.

But you like to be kept guessing...so I was just acquiescing to your preferences (;) )

Frenzy
09-05-2008, 01:06 PM
The apparent divide in this debate is interesting.
Yup. i agree with Sinistrum et. al. It IS stupid, it IS asinine, it IS paranoid. But where my kids are concerned, i'll tackle the 50% probable danger, and the .005% probable one. Dead from a .005% probability is still dead.

yes, that's paranoid and stupid and hyperbole, but most if not all parents on this board would agree with it. We don't have to like it, we can acknowledge the illogic of it all, but it's our everyday life.

Bryan Blaire
09-05-2008, 01:15 PM
Hell, SDog, I think I'm that paranoid anyway... ;) Maybe I am ready to be a parent, OR I'm just going to have some looney toons children.

Hopper
09-05-2008, 01:16 PM
I used to think that parents were a bit insane with the "protect the kids from everything all the time" plan of attack. Now that I'm a step-dad, it all makes perfect sense. She's almost 13 and I'm already terrified of teenage boys. I remember how I used to think (and what with) when I was that age.

Gilshalos Sedai
09-05-2008, 01:56 PM
Wait, Hopper, you stopped?

tanaww
09-05-2008, 02:17 PM
I used to think that parents were a bit insane with the "protect the kids from everything all the time" plan of attack. Now that I'm a step-dad, it all makes perfect sense. She's almost 13 and I'm already terrified of teenage boys. I remember how I used to think (and what with) when I was that age.

You should be afraid of teenage boys, Mr. Vice President because they are thinking of way worse things than you did at that age.

Davian93
09-05-2008, 02:44 PM
You should be afraid of teenage boys, Mr. Vice President because they are thinking of way worse things than you did at that age.

I was thinking about sex when I was 13...I'm sure things have changed a bunch in 14 years though.

Purple Dragon
09-05-2008, 03:14 PM
so.. few knows i have started a new job. working with kids around the age of 11 - 13ish...

now, i realise that Denmark is a lot more coarse and openminded than petty America, with all their rules, regulations and fear..

but the kids here knows how to play--- uhm... i think it's called Cracker or something in english... a rather vile game alledgedly played by males that involves eating bodyfluids...

they also know what analsex is... seriously... i'm pretty sure i didn't at that age... or that it at least would have made me blush...

weird shit is a foot... so wipe'em before entering m'house

Davian93
09-05-2008, 03:16 PM
but the kids here knows how to play--- uhm... i think it's called Cracker or something in english... a rather vile game alledgedly played by males that involves eating bodyfluids...

Hmmm....sounds just a tad gay...assuming they're playing it with each other.

Crispin's Crispian
09-05-2008, 04:14 PM
weird shit is a foot... so wipe'em before entering m'house

I believe that's called a fetish. There are tons of Interweb sites about that--try to look up anything to do with shoes or feet and you'll see what I mean. Not to mention regular porn...

tworiverswoman
09-05-2008, 05:32 PM
PD - I think the point here is that of those 80,000 odd children being abducted, an infestimally small number are being taken at a little league sports event. AND, you have to remember, since its strangers taking those kids, it does almost nothing to remove the names from the jerseys. Sexual Predator X isn't thinking "oooh his nickname is 'Sparky', I'll nab him". (I'm still wondering how come you're calling me by my asha'man's name, but...shrug)

Ozy -- you (and some others) are missing the point. This isn't a "Hallelieujah! With this move we shall prevent Child Abduction!" It's a single tiny step designed to make the child predator's job a teensy bit harder. Anyone who thinks a parent is limiting himself to hiding his kid's first name is ... well, let me be polite and not go there.

And also, Ozy -- no one, I'm pretty sure, has suggested that predators pick their victims because the name appeals to them. That was a thoughtless comment.

Here's a sample scene for you: Young girl/boy is walking down the sidewalk in his own neighborhood, and a car drives by him and slows. Man in car says in a friendly tone, "Hey, kid! I'm looking for ... (whatever)" Child is going to be wary and suspicious, possibly ready to bolt, especially if his parents have done their job.

But what if the guy yells, "Hey, Johnny! I'm looking for...(whatever)" -- the kid may not recognize the voice -- but hearing his own name is going to cause him to stop moving and turn to look to see if the man is known to him. That's all it may take to give the guy time to make a snatch.

As Tanaww says -- this is a KNOWN and PROVEN TECHNIQUE for child predators to get their victims. Those of you who are sneering in contempt haven't been paying attention.

DeiwosTheSkyGod
09-05-2008, 05:39 PM
but the kids here knows how to play--- uhm... i think it's called Cracker or something in english... a rather vile game alledgedly played by males that involves eating bodyfluids...

I can't see any American kid playing that game :p

Davian93
09-05-2008, 05:42 PM
We're not sneering...just pointing out that paranoia is taking things a tad too far sometimes. Bottom line is that your kid has a greater chance of getting struck by lightning than abducted and a far greater chance of dying in a car accident. At what point do you step back and just accept risk?

I think its ridiculous that some parents want to put GPS tracking devices in (yes inside...under the skin...kinda like giving them a Mark...they even say the best place to put it is the wrist....odd) their kids so they can always know where they're at or that they keep them in the shopping cart so they don't get abducted at the supermarket or they take their 9 year old boy in the women's bathroom to pee because they might get abducted there too.

Our society has become so sissified in every aspect and this is another part of that general fear that everyone seems to constantly live in the shadow of. People are absolutely terrified of everything and they wrap themselves in so many layers of protection that they end up shutting themselves off from even living. Granted this name tag thing isn't really at that level but thats where the annoyance comes from. It saddens me when people continually trade any type of decision making and freedom for perceived safety. It also saddens me when everyone is forced to change because of the most paranoid member of the herd.

tworiverswoman
09-05-2008, 06:04 PM
What puzzles me is that you are including THIS in the "too far" category. As protective steps go, it probably ranks among the quickest, simplest and least disruptive ones I can think of.

That GPS idea ... gah. I can sympathize with the Mom or Dad that thinks "I wish..." but one that actually DOES it has stepped way over the line into big-brotherhood for my taste.

"Sissifying" -- well, I can agree with much of your rant here. I think kids that aren't allowed to get hurt because they've done something stupid --this ranges from trying to roller-skate down "Death Slope Hill" (or the local equivalent) to cheating on a math test and getting caught at it -- there's more than one kind of harm-- are in danger of growing up without ever understanding the concept of CONSEQUENCES.

I like the way Frenzy lets them take their lumps -- as long as those lumps are not of a permanent nature. I've seen Lisa with her brood, so I know she has the right idea. But I've known people who wanted to sue the school because their child tripped and fell during phys-ed and got a few cuts and bruises. Dumb.

Child predators are not something parents have the slightest control over. They take whatever precautionary measures are available to them, because the anguish of NOT taking them, and having the worst happen, would likely destroy them. This is a gut feeling I'm in full sympathy with, despite having no kids of my own.

tanaww
09-05-2008, 09:40 PM
I've seen Lisa with her brood, so I know she has the right idea.

Beat them early, beat them often, teach them to beat other people and make sure they know what birth control is.

Ozymandias
09-05-2008, 09:55 PM
And also, Ozy -- no one, I'm pretty sure, has suggested that predators pick their victims because the name appeals to them. That was a thoughtless comment.

Here's a sample scene for you: Young girl/boy is walking down the sidewalk in his own neighborhood, and a car drives by him and slows. Man in car says in a friendly tone, "Hey, kid! I'm looking for ... (whatever)" Child is going to be wary and suspicious, possibly ready to bolt, especially if his parents have done their job.

But what if the guy yells, "Hey, Johnny! I'm looking for...(whatever)" -- the kid may not recognize the voice -- but hearing his own name is going to cause him to stop moving and turn to look to see if the man is known to him. That's all it may take to give the guy time to make a snatch.

I'm pretty sure in the situation you describe that 99/100 the kid is going to be grabbed anyways, regardless of who's name the predator throws out there, and that 1 who gets away isn't getting away because they guy didn't know his name.

Maybe my opinion isn't as developed on this, seeing as I don't have kids and won't for several years (god willing), but I DO remember what its like to play rec sports and hear people cheering for me. As supposed to hearing "go #13!". Its a much bigger confidence booster to hear your name.

And besides, looking at this logically. If I'm the sexual predator, all I do is go up to a parent cheering and say "who is that #13? He's really good." Bam. I have a name. And don't tell me you'd be suspicious... this is, as everyone has said, a false security blanket that takes away a valuable function of recreational sports and gives nothing tangible in return.

Matoyak
09-06-2008, 12:49 AM
I would like to repeat that only places with relatively rich game leagues even GET their first name on jerseys. The most you normally get is a number, and you're LUCKY if you get a last name.

Also, it's psychological. Having a name for a face helps the child predator, and a young kid that hears his name might more easily assume that the nice man in the car really DOES work at his dad's workplace and is here to give him a ride home.

Terez
09-06-2008, 09:58 AM
We had last names on jerseys on my tee-ball teams, but no one puts first names on jerseys...not even the pros...

Bryan Blaire
09-06-2008, 10:44 AM
I actually don't know of any place, even the rich ones, where kids have their first names put on jerseys. Is that really something that is starting to be done?

Best self-defense technique I've ever seen taught: "Scream, bite, stomp and drop to the ground as hard as you can, then run for a group of people."

Cary Sedai
09-06-2008, 11:00 AM
I actually don't know of any place, even the rich ones, where kids have their first names put on jerseys. Is that really something that is starting to be done?

About 18 years ago, I went with my Aunt to my cousins hockey game, he was about 9. All the kids had either thier first names, or nick-names on thier jerseys.

This was in the nortwest corner of Indiana. If I'm remembering correctly, hockey was really starting to take hold over soccer. Maybe, it's the proximity to Canada, no idea. :p

This wasn't a particularly rich town, just a "suburb of Chicago". The "hockey moms" were more into it than some of the kids, lol. Though I guess that happens. Maybe having the names on thier jerseys was some sort of status quo thing.

That's the only time I've seen names on Jerseys.

Bryan Blaire
09-06-2008, 11:42 AM
Well, I mean, you always see the last names on football and baseball jerseys. I didn't know any sports used first names or nicknames.

Cary Sedai
09-06-2008, 12:58 PM
That's the only time I've seen names on Jerseys.

*last names

I never had a name on my jerseys. Though that was school sports, not outside of school.

Uno
09-06-2008, 01:48 PM
OK, so you do, in fact, get annoyed more easily than I do, Davian. Who would've thought I'd be dethroned in that respect? Children are actually pretty stupid, or, rather, it's pretty easy for even a modestly clever adult to fool a little kid, and successful child predators are necessarily experienced in doing just that.

Besides, personalizing shirts strikes me as a waste of money, so if you can save a bit of cash and possibly make the kiddies a tiny bit safer, why the hell not? I'm all for saving money, as I'm a stingy old codger.

Terez
09-06-2008, 01:58 PM
OK, so you do, in fact, get annoyed more easily than I do, Davian. Who would've thought I'd be dethroned in that respect?
If it makes you feel better, you're a lot grumpier than he is.

Davian93
09-08-2008, 06:12 AM
If it makes you feel better, you're a lot grumpier than he is.

I'm guessing some posters here might disagree with that. i'm been rather bitchy alot lately...I mean grumpy.

Gilshalos Sedai
09-08-2008, 07:25 AM
No, you got it right the first time. I may need an extra Shiner to tolerate you further. ;)

Davian93
09-08-2008, 07:42 AM
No, you got it right the first time. I may need an extra Shiner to tolerate you further. ;)

~fetches Shiner~

Here you go.;)

Anaiya Sedai
09-08-2008, 08:43 AM
there was a documentary on TV here a few weeks ago called Cotton Wool Kids (http://www.channel4.com/video/cotton-wool-kids/series-1/). What really made me cringe about it wasn't just the fact that some of the parents were too scared to let their children leave the house, or had those little tracking things put into them, but the way the kids were brainwashed - some of them actually believed that the world was evil, and that their parents were right to act the way they did.

No first names on jerseys, fair enough. looks silly, in my eyes, anyway. and yeah, maybe I can see where they are coming from, even if the majority of child abuse is inflicted by people close to the child.
If you let your child go to sporting events like that, they should be properly supervised, though. and if you really can't find anyone to supervise them for a couple of hours (one of the other parents, a coach, whatever), then you should at least make sure that your child knows how to behave around strangers. isn't that something they teach anymore? they actually made us watch little documentaries made for children about abductions, to understand the topic; we were about 7, and the lesson stuck.

Gilshalos Sedai
09-08-2008, 08:47 AM
But that might put odd ideas into Junior's head, Ana, about independant thought and actually leaving the house when he hits adulthood!

Davian93
09-08-2008, 08:54 AM
But that might put odd ideas into Junior's head, Ana, about independant thought and actually leaving the house when he hits adulthood!

This is probably why alot of kids live with their parents till they're 30 now.

Anaiya Sedai
09-08-2008, 08:54 AM
of course.
god, my mum was overly protective over me, but she still saw reason sometimes.. my parents used to always say to me how they were happy I phoned if I was going to be more than 15 minutes late.
But when I got older, and my mum still gave me curfews like for a 12 year old, I obviously started to rebel. big time.

Personally, I don't agree with letting your children run wild, but wrapping them in cotton wool is usually just as bad.

Anaiya Sedai
09-08-2008, 07:42 PM
http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j161/BlitzPlayerX/Motivational%20Posters/46FIBH5TKLOLILVYQHFHI7EMATV7OJAA_.jpg

Davian93
09-08-2008, 08:40 PM
Where'd they get a picture of my van?

Matoyak
09-08-2008, 11:29 PM
I was about to ask where they got the picture of my candy store...