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Old 04-18-2017, 10:09 AM
connabard connabard is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 144
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I feel similarly, though for the opposite reasons. I am afraid of coming across as dumb if I voice my opinions, etc.

I will say, something I've noticed is that a lot of people aren't used to disagreements, in a sense. I notice everyone here doesn't qualify their language when disagreeing with things like 'well I think' and 'I'm not sure' and I know people that are super intimidated by that level of certainty and then... defense mechanisms.

I'd suggest maybe soft-balling your approach to voicing your opinions? Do things like "well, I'm not sure, but I think X about Y" or even (but make sure to not use a condescending tone) ask them "interesting. what do you think?" etc

My father was a blunt man so I grew up just stating things but I've learned a lot of people take that aggressively, and more inclined to get offended at that rather than at what you're actually saying.

EDIT: As for what friends are for, I'm not entirely sure. I like to think it's good to have a separate life than that of your spouse, and friends are a vehicle for that. But I'm also unwed and young, so I could be entirely off the mark there.

Last edited by connabard; 04-18-2017 at 10:13 AM.
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