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  #21  
Old 09-22-2016, 09:41 AM
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Taer lives!!! Hey Taer!!!

Yeah! I got lucky and remembered all my log in stuff too!
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  #22  
Old 09-22-2016, 08:08 PM
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Yeah! I got lucky and remembered all my log in stuff too!
That definitely comes in handy.



I guess it's too much to ask that you just keep yourself logged in?
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  #23  
Old 09-24-2016, 08:57 PM
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Yeah! I got lucky and remembered all my log in stuff too!
What have you been up to lately? The Mrs. and me moved to Denver if you hadn't heard so we've been super busy.
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  #24  
Old 10-16-2016, 07:28 PM
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What have you been up to lately? The Mrs. and me moved to Denver if you hadn't heard so we've been super busy.
Congrats! Still watching Mamma Mia everyday?

Well, since it's been a long time since I've been on, I'll give you a deep update.

We got complete custody of both kids about a year and a half ago. Mother is no longer in the picture and Al is looking at adopting Sarah.

Jon is almost 20 now and talking about joining the Air Force. He's dying to go to Jordancon. Believe it or not, he's having a conniption to sit down and jam with Terez about a few things.

Sarah has a new device called a PRC 1400. It's an eye gaze device that speaks for her. It's incredibly cool technology. When I can get some good video of her using it, I'll post it here. In the meantime, look up PRC 1400 on you tube or the webs and you should be able to see how it works. They said it might be a year or two before she was able to start putting sentences together, and in 3 months, she's already started making 3 word sentences. It's pretty funny when I try to help her with something and she says "Stop! Don't!" She's definitely a 15 yr old girl. We're looking at scoliosis surgery in the very near future...it scares the shit outta me, but it has to be done.

Wife and I are good...really good. We bought a new house about 2 years ago. We're working on getting a stairlift so I can go back to work full time. I quit smoking, even though I have a cigar now and then. I did yoga with my 10 yr old for about a month and thought I was going to DIE!

Jake is still playing baseball. He also loves to sing. I'm pushing him towards chorus in middle school. He hates to read (go figure) so we are fighting that. He's ten and reads at about a 6 or 7 yr old level. It's not because he can't, it's because he just doesn't want to do it. He's comprehension is pitiful. If anyone has any pointers, then send them my way. We've tried comic books, magazines, short stories and intervention, but nothing works. Now we're slow,y taking things away until he decides that we're not playing.
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  #25  
Old 10-18-2016, 12:31 AM
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Have you tried having him read to Murphy?
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  #26  
Old 10-18-2016, 06:22 AM
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Jake is still playing baseball. He also loves to sing. I'm pushing him towards chorus in middle school. He hates to read (go figure) so we are fighting that. He's ten and reads at about a 6 or 7 yr old level. It's not because he can't, it's because he just doesn't want to do it. He's comprehension is pitiful.
How do you know he can read but doesn't want to. Has he been tested for dyslexia or some other learning disability?

What you describe sounds much like my younger daughter at that age. She's pushing 40, now, and still doesn't read much beyond fourth or fifth grade level and is horribly slow if she's going to have any comprehension at all. Even if he's been tested, some forms of dyslexia and learning disabilities don't show up until later than normal testing for that kind of thing happens.
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  #27  
Old 10-18-2016, 03:59 PM
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Actually, it may have something to do with the reading material present. I had that exact issue. I could read, but the reading material the teachers gave me was not holding my interest. It took stumbling on Animorphs in the 3rd grade before I found something that actually gave me something decent to read.

Maybe see if there are different books out there that can interest him?
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  #28  
Old 10-18-2016, 05:47 PM
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Not any advice really but maybe some hope - my brother was like that. It took him forever to demonstrate that he could read (he could, he just didn't want to until the rule " those who cannot read, cannot play with the computer" was instated. Anyway, he proved he could read, and then did as little of it as he possibly could. He just didn't want to. It took until University to get him to actually read a proper book. We recently had a talk about how he's now really enjoying reading (he's in the middle of a Warren Buffett autobiography right now) and he makes a point to read half an hour every night

Speaking of computers, how about some games that have lots of text? Or where you need to interact with other players via reading and typing rather than talking?
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  #29  
Old 10-19-2016, 10:36 AM
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It's not any kind of disability, like dyslexia. In my opinion anyway. He hates reading so much that he rushes through it and misses a lot of words. For instance, when he tests, if the question is mutilple choice and asks which is NOT in the story, he'll generally pick the one that is because he skipped the not part of the question. He does this a lot when he reads to me. He just wants to be done with it so he tries to get done as fast as he can.

His writing is also good, other than the spelling mistakes you'd expect from a 5th grader. Although he does hate to write almost as much as he hates to read.

I guess we just have to keep encouraging him until we figure something out that works.
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  #30  
Old 10-19-2016, 11:28 AM
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It's not any kind of disability, like dyslexia. In my opinion anyway. He hates reading so much that he rushes through it and misses a lot of words. For instance, when he tests, if the question is mutilple choice and asks which is NOT in the story, he'll generally pick the one that is because he skipped the not part of the question. He does this a lot when he reads to me. He just wants to be done with it so he tries to get done as fast as he can.

His writing is also good, other than the spelling mistakes you'd expect from a 5th grader. Although he does hate to write almost as much as he hates to read.

I guess we just have to keep encouraging him until we figure something out that works.
Now this is just my distant two cents based entirely on how you describe his behaviour, but it sounds like he is caught in an anxiety cycle. There probably isn't an actual trauma involved which he associates with reading, but the act is unpleasant to him. I'd guess he first just found it boring, then that lack of motivation lead to bad results which he as one would expect didn't like. I'd say his general mood is that he has to be good at something he doesn't like doing and the pressure builds up and he fails. So in spite of the work put in he fails and so it all seems like a waste of time. Why work when failing is absolute? Rewarding success doesn't work when he has no confidence.

Now this part is just a possibility and I have no reason to assume that it happened, but if he at some point did succeed and felt the reward was insufficient it would explain a lot. And I stress that the point is how he felt about it not whether the feeling was justified.

To sum up problems and solutions:

1) Lack of motivation. Find something he actually likes to read.

2) Lack of confidence. Show him that there are degrees in failure and success. Reward improvement.

3) Trust. Make sure that he knows you are on his side no matter what. Tell him that you want him to live a happy life and that this skill is necessary for that.

4) The possible disapointment in rewards. Let him name a reward and then set your demands for it. Be very careful in this. If his demands are unreasonable explain why and encourage him to ask for something else. Again how he values things is the measure you should go with, not how society sees things and not how you see them.
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  #31  
Old 10-19-2016, 12:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Sei'taer View Post
It's not any kind of disability, like dyslexia. In my opinion anyway. He hates reading so much that he rushes through it and misses a lot of words. For instance, when he tests, if the question is mutilple choice and asks which is NOT in the story, he'll generally pick the one that is because he skipped the not part of the question. He does this a lot when he reads to me. He just wants to be done with it so he tries to get done as fast as he can.

His writing is also good, other than the spelling mistakes you'd expect from a 5th grader. Although he does hate to write almost as much as he hates to read.

I guess we just have to keep encouraging him until we figure something out that works.
You could put a belt, a hammer and a book down on the table and ask him to choose...

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  #32  
Old 10-19-2016, 01:26 PM
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Congrats! Still watching Mamma Mia everyday?

Well, since it's been a long time since I've been on, I'll give you a deep update.

We got complete custody of both kids about a year and a half ago. Mother is no longer in the picture and Al is looking at adopting Sarah.

Jon is almost 20 now and talking about joining the Air Force. He's dying to go to Jordancon. Believe it or not, he's having a conniption to sit down and jam with Terez about a few things.

Sarah has a new device called a PRC 1400. It's an eye gaze device that speaks for her. It's incredibly cool technology. When I can get some good video of her using it, I'll post it here. In the meantime, look up PRC 1400 on you tube or the webs and you should be able to see how it works. They said it might be a year or two before she was able to start putting sentences together, and in 3 months, she's already started making 3 word sentences. It's pretty funny when I try to help her with something and she says "Stop! Don't!" She's definitely a 15 yr old girl. We're looking at scoliosis surgery in the very near future...it scares the shit outta me, but it has to be done.

Wife and I are good...really good. We bought a new house about 2 years ago. We're working on getting a stairlift so I can go back to work full time. I quit smoking, even though I have a cigar now and then. I did yoga with my 10 yr old for about a month and thought I was going to DIE!

Jake is still playing baseball. He also loves to sing. I'm pushing him towards chorus in middle school. He hates to read (go figure) so we are fighting that. He's ten and reads at about a 6 or 7 yr old level. It's not because he can't, it's because he just doesn't want to do it. He's comprehension is pitiful. If anyone has any pointers, then send them my way. We've tried comic books, magazines, short stories and intervention, but nothing works. Now we're slow,y taking things away until he decides that we're not playing.
Good to hear you are doing well And that Sarah is doing great!

I guess you are pushing Jake to read because it's necessary for school?
Because i don't think he will discover the joys of reading if he is pushed
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  #33  
Old 10-19-2016, 03:09 PM
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Huh. To me that sounds more like he's bored and impatient to get it done with. Quite common with gifted children forced to work way below their level. Have you tried if challenging him more peaks his interest?

On the other hand, it also sounds like my problem with simple arithmetic - I just can't do it. I'm fine with vectors and geometry and variables and theory but ask me what's 15+9-8 and it'll take a ridiculous amount of time. I'll get it, I just really have to focus and double check and triple check before giving the answer.
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  #34  
Old 10-19-2016, 05:21 PM
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On the other hand, it also sounds like my problem with simple arithmetic - I just can't do it. I'm fine with vectors and geometry and variables and theory but ask me what's 15+9-8 and it'll take a ridiculous amount of time. I'll get it, I just really have to focus and double check and triple check before giving the answer.
The trick to arithmetic is to group the likes to make round numbers or do the simple stuff first. In your example, if you add the 9 to 15 (24) and then subtract the 8 (16) its a good deal more complicated than doing 9-8 (1) + 15.

Which might be a similar problem to the reading.
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  #35  
Old 10-20-2016, 03:38 AM
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Of course, if you shuffle around words in sentences the way you can do terms in arithmetic, the results may occasionally not be what the writer intended.
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Old 10-20-2016, 10:21 AM
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That's because ease the rules for languages and the rules for math are different.

That said you can still rearrange a sentence, pick some better words that have the same or similar meanings and make a sentence easier to understand.
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Old 10-20-2016, 01:27 PM
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That's because ease the rules for languages and the rules for math are different.

That said you can still rearrange a sentence, pick some better words that have the same or similar meanings and make a sentence easier to understand.
Yeah, but if you do that with someone else's sentence, the result isn't always what was intended, is it?
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Old 10-20-2016, 02:27 PM
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Language has rules. As long you follow them you should be ok.
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