View Full Version : Belated new hello

09-22-2008, 07:02 PM

I was reminded on another thread I should post hello here. I thought I had, but I was apparently tripping on too much Dew at the time, which is all too often the case with me. :-P

So yea. I've poked at Theoryland for a couple of years now as I've read through the books, just never made a forum account. Glad to finally say 'hello' to everyone. ^_^

09-22-2008, 07:39 PM
And here is the promised welcome:

Welcome Heinz!!

You may call me Naz!

Enjoy the roasted marshmallows you will no doubt be offered as soon as I'm on fire!

Speaking of which:

*Holds up the Torch*

Anaiya Sedai
09-22-2008, 08:28 PM
*sets naz on fire*

*roasts sausages*

*breaks open the mead and sits on the ESC*


09-22-2008, 08:31 PM
Are you talking to the newbie or the ketchup, Flaming Haran?

*Roasts marshmellows*

*Hands some to Heinz*

09-22-2008, 09:16 PM
*curiously considers the marshmellows offered by the person they had been roasted on* Wonder if this is anything like cooking meat over mesquite grill chips..

And thanks for the reminder, Anaiya. Have a home-made mead recipe I've been meaning to try and make.

09-22-2008, 10:09 PM
Welcome to Theoryland, Heinz. :)

09-23-2008, 12:10 AM
Ah! Ze Germans are coming!

Erm... I mean... Welcome to the Insanity, Heinz! Who's your favorite character? Are you a Faile-Lover or a Berelain fan? What's your favorite scene? How old are you? Should we refer to you as he or she? Or do you prefer to be "it"? Or Ketchup?

09-23-2008, 10:16 AM
Welcome to Theoryland, Heinz! :D

~wonders how anyone could possibly be a Faile Lover~

09-23-2008, 10:21 AM
Heinz- there are no better kinds!


09-23-2008, 10:55 AM
Yes, yes we are coming. :-P Technically I'm Dutch by ancestory, American by birth, but I did study German for about 8 years and lived there for a year.

Eeep, lots of questions! Welp, I'll get the easy, practical stuff out of the way. 27 years old, and definately a 'he', though 'Ketchup' is something my SW Galaxies guildmates all liked to call me so I'm quite used to it.

I wouldn't call myself a Berelain fan, but I cannot stand Faile/Zarine. She's as bad if not worse than Nyneave (I know I spelled it wrong, at work and can't look it all up. Typing up in notepad so I can C&P the text to post actually), and Elayne is only slightly better. Yes, all three of those women annoy me to an amount I did not think possible for fictional characters in a book. Credit to Jordan for bringing them to life to that extent. Anyway, Faile makes Perrin's life hell, and often knows she's doing it but does it anyway. Then again, Berelain is just looking for a piece of meat, much like Tylin with Mat, which is only slightly better. Her bonus points come from being a little more political and, at least part of the time, letting her personal desires/problems fall second. All Faile seems to care about is how she can barb Perrin or her parents again. But then, I've taken to not liking Perrin much either. He's become too love-struck to the point where he's blinded to almost anything else. There are times I wish I could punch him in the face.

My own favorite character would be Mat, I suppose. It didn't start that way. I liked Rand the most at first, but he's become too stubborn and too arrogant. By design, I know, but that doens't change the opinion. The last couple of books, I actually didn't like even reading the parts with Rand (yet I read anyway. o.O). I wish there was more time left to further develop Mat's path with the Band and the Seanchan. That and the story with Egwene (Also among my favorites, though she has a tendancy to make what I think are silly decisions based on fool stubbornness too) have so much to tell, each could be their own main story in a book. Following close behind Mat, I've taken to liking Bashere and Bryne. As a side-note and not at all related, I also enjoy strategy war-gaming, have gotten into fencing, and overall enjoy the idea of the proper, moral, chivalristic knight and general. :-P But Mat I identify with more, of course, being younger. Also because he is a main character instead of a support, Mat is developed more and there are more elements to him.

Not coincidentally, my favorite scene then is the culmination of Mat's development thus far. From where he re-joins the Band and fights that campaign against the Seanchan, just before Tuon confirms their marriage, and ending with one of the last chapters in Knife of Dreams, 'Prince of Ravens'.

I know some people would groan at the prospect of more books, but to me that's the fun part of Wheel of Time. I wish there were just a couple more to further develop what I think are very intricate situations. I think the series is going to end far too soon, and rush endings to give a bit of a let-down. The biggest ones are the stories of Mat and Egwene. The home continent of Seanchan is a mess, there is no clear leadership, and the Forerunners are mired in policing states. They still have to attack the Tower too, which could be its own climax in a separate book. Should be. And the Tower is so thoroughly broken at the moment. I can guess at a couple of quick fixes so they fight the Last Battle, but it still all feels too rushed. Lan's forming a borderland army isn't a very small feat either. Elayne will have to get Andor somehow re-organized enough to support their army going to a foreign war, and she'll possibly need to get Cairien as well. These are two countries wrecked by civil war, how are they supposed to fight a foreign war? And as side-plots, there's the Tower of Genji, Tuon re-claiming her position and ascending to the Crystal Throne, Rand at some point bowing to the Crystal Throne, the issue of Slayer, the Red Ajah bonding Ash'aman, the Purge in the Tower, and any number of other things I'm not thinking of off the top of my head and can't look up. (Its a slow day, and my boss doesn't know what I do all day anyway, just that things get done and people are happy. But I try not to web surf too much, lest they actually check web hits from work computers.)

So yea, that's my thoughts on the series. I know some people are tired of the series and want it to conclude. To me, while I wouldn't want it to go on forever, I wish there were about 3 more books, maybe 4, instead of 1. Too often you get into a trilogy or shorter series, you get attached to a character or two, and then its done. All over. Or the series is carried on by multiple authors, such as Star Wars or Star Trek books, so your character can be VERY different from one book to the next. Now this, by a very sad circumstance, will have an author switch, but in a situation where continuity of the plot and story will be as in tact as possible while allowing the new author to write his piece. Overall the series is that much better because it is a solid piece of writing, not fragmented by so many different people writing. I always liked the time and detail Jordan took to develop things, I hate to see it end so quickly.

That give you a better idea of me? Perhaps even more than you wanted? :-D

09-23-2008, 11:06 AM
That's a little better. Next time, try to use some quotes from the books.

09-23-2008, 11:13 AM
"Blood and bloody ashes", the series shouldn't end just yet!

Oh, and Rand has become a "light-blinded fool".

Better? :D

09-23-2008, 11:27 AM
You should cite book and chapter names.

09-23-2008, 11:33 AM
Heinz doesn't need minders.

09-23-2008, 11:36 AM
Everyone needs minders. Especially noobs.

Cary Sedai
09-23-2008, 12:36 PM
Welcome Heinz!

~sprinkles Heinz with fairy dust~

I call dibs on lighting Naz on fire next! Your not sharing, Anaiya! :p

Heinz, that was extremely enlighting. I like both Berelain and Faile. I too wish there were 3 or 4 more books. Then off-shoots about Seanchan, and the aftermath from the Last Battle... I dont' like when good stories end. :)

~roast some marshmellows~

~shares with everyone~

09-23-2008, 01:44 PM
Sis, why don't your Warders join the Friends of the Flame?

Cary Sedai
09-23-2008, 02:45 PM
~arches eyebrow~

Same reason they aren't PD's minions.

09-23-2008, 04:14 PM
The Friends are not my minions

09-23-2008, 05:31 PM
welcome, welcome

*jumps on the ESC and steals some of Anaiya's mead*

gotta do it like a viking when drinking mead

Anaiya Sedai
09-23-2008, 05:41 PM
*cracks open some more mead and passes it around*

*roasts marshmallows*

and: wow that was a long and informative message.

09-23-2008, 08:28 PM
Thanks Heinz!! What do you do for a living that keeps everyone so happy?

~~gratefully accepts some mead from Anaiya~~

~~blows gently on Naz to get the flames higher~~

~~brings some jiffy pop- commences with popcorn preparation~~

09-23-2008, 08:57 PM
More blowing? I must say Brita if you keep this up I shall have to promote you to Firelady.

09-23-2008, 09:03 PM
Just doing what I can to keep the party going...

09-23-2008, 09:13 PM
Such sacrifices for the happiness of others... Very sweet of you

09-23-2008, 09:23 PM
Such sacrifices for the happiness of others... Very sweet of you

If I am anything- it is the picture of sweetness http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/5.gif

~~blows gently again~~

09-23-2008, 09:28 PM
Ohhhh baby! I could get used to this

09-23-2008, 10:33 PM
Heh, I'm a Quality Control Analyst, and that's where the official definition ends. Basically, when people don't know what to do with something or how it should be fixed, if it should really go to IT or to another department, or they simply don't have a clue what is wrong, they hand it to me and tell me to figure it out. Its fun in its own way, but there's only so many things that can go wrong with a third party insurance administrator so some days get pretty slow and boring. :-P

And yes, I have a habit of including excessive detail, and can type rapidly. My boss has two classifications when she wants me to send information or a new procedure to handle something; normal detail and 'Heinz detail' (using my actual name instead of a screen one, of course).

Zaela Sedai
09-24-2008, 03:28 PM
Consider yourself officially welcomed to Theoryland HEINZ! (YAY NOOBS!) As I'm sure you've noticed, we have a pretty decent community of WoT fanatics over here. One of the ways that we keep it all friendly is a short list of courtesies we ask people to follow and, once in a while, actually do get followed. Imagine that! Insane people following some sort of order!

1) Don't flood the board with multiple THREADS all at once.
Allow us the time to absorb, evaluate, and discuss, OR LAUGH at one or two ideas, OR JOKES at a time. Some of us like to do a little research before responding and that can take a little time. Of course, we also have those others who are just a bit slow. Read that as "just can't handle more than one thought in their heads at once" or "dial-up modem". Your choice. I'd suggest "have a real life", but not likely. Does anyone still have dial up? Wow...it's getting hard to give the slow people an excuse

Addendum to 1) Try to stay on topic.
Going off on tangents can be super fun and is something we are all guilty of your's truly included but try and keep threads on topic unless, 1) the thread is dead or 2) the thread naturally moves over to another topic. This rule is much more lax for joke threads, pop culture threads...etc.

2) Try to back up your opinions & theories.
You'll get a lot more respect if you can. Quotes from the books (of which you CANNOT read too much) are your best weapon. Quotes from interviews are semi-acceptable. Gut feelings are pseudo-acceptable. Whitecloak blind-faith is best submitted while wearing asbestos panties.

3) Feel free to get as emotionally involved as you'd like.
Discussions can get very heated. But try not to take things personally. Remember: we only insult the ones we love. Or the ones we eventually hand over to the Trollocs.

4) Be respectful.
A lot of people have been around Theoryland for a long time. Being a Youngling means you're new around here. We do understand that you may have been reading WoT forever, but if you're gonna pick a fight regarding a WoT theory with someone who's an Elder, Ancient or Hero, understand that they've been around for a while now, and probably have posting friends. And Tamyrlin is Lord of the Board for a reason: this whole place is his brainchild. Keep that in mind. They also have posting enemies.... a good little bit of information to tuck away.

Addendum to 4: This is an international community.
In regards to the Non-WoT discussion groups, please respect the opinions of people from nations and cultures other than your own, even if you disagree with them or the policies of their leaders and politicians. Try to remember that not everyone here has the same outlook or life experience that you might. If you want to send a letter or e-mail to anyone in particular to indicate any specific moral, educational, intellectual, or genetic deficiencies they may have, feel free. Just please don't do it here.

Addendum 1 to Addendum 4: We don't all agree about the issues regarding the military action in Iraq. Post about this issue at your own risk. Things seem to be under control now. Though, there have been some flare-ups….be careful. We have had our own TLers over there, back home safe and sound, hope it stays that way. (I can't wait to be able to delete this Addendum.)

Addendum 2 to Addendum 4: Please no angry profanity.
If you really need to tell someone off, be creative. And replacing characters with @$$ does NOT constitute creativity. I like tend to like the Shakespearean approach myself. The smarter and more subtle you are with it, just makes the person look that much more an idiot.

Addendum 3 to Addendum 4: Please be nice to Newbies.
We were all new at one time you are one right now and there is no need to come down on anyone for asking questions that to the elder community may be basic knowledge. This is for you to remember after you've been here awhile.

Addendum 4 to Addendum 4: Please TRY not to feed the Trolls.
Trust me, it ain't easy at times, but ignore the obvious instigators. Just sit yourself down between the Heroes and Ancients sharpening the WTF Couch sticks. There are many on the board who know how to deal with this breed, leave them to it. It can be quite entertaining. If things get too offensive to the population in general, Mods will intervene. Feel free, however, to respond to Gonzo, our Resident Troll, we love him like a red-headed step child.

5) Please don't use the New Users Forum to recruit.
We have plenty of room in the other forums for begging for support for factions, theories, and the TCA. Please let the newbies look around for a while before taking sides in any pseudo-battles. ~looks around~ our biggest offender has not been around for a while ~sniff~

6) Most important: Have Fun!
We do this because we love it and like to think that we are, at least, reasonably intelligent. Hell, some of us have deluded ourselves into believing that we've evolved into supremely intelligent beings! Half the posters here believe that divine supremacy has already come to them! My vote is for Frenzy, and myself, of course. You know the Truth when you see it. :D Don't let T and her massive bag o' quotes fool you. ;) We will assume some intelligence on your part. You found us, didn't you? Until you prove otherwise…and there are many who have, you'll be safe. If you get hurt if you do prove otherwise, I will offer my one free Healing…but just that once.

Remember, you EARN your respect here, it's not given out freely and some may never know the pleasure.

Welcome to our little rounded corner! It’s a great time!


Zaela Sedai, Official Theoryland Greeter, Mistress of Novices

P.S.: Be good…don’t make me take out my chains, I am the Lady of them for a reason! ;) stupid no evil smilie

Here's some stuff you'd be much better off knowing BEFORE you post :cool:


Heroes of the Horn

Have been here longer than most, and some of them have been around since the dawn of time. You don't have to worship at their feet (well you can worship at Frenzy's, if you must), but a little respect goes a long way.


The next group down from HotH. Also tend to be prolific posters, although some Ancients suffer from a mysterious disease. It sometimes happens that once an Ancient is raised, they disappear for a while, or forever. It really can be a blessing in disguise.


The next group up from Younglings. More knowledgeable than Younglings, not necessarily less knowledgable than Ancients. They have been here long enough to know better about most things. I repeat, MOST things


By far the biggest bunch at Theoryland. Just means that you are recently signed up, not that you're young and/or immature. You might have to prove that, though. But you can edit your own posts! Yippee! Umm yeah...enjoy that.

So, how do you move up the Ranks?

Well, posting madly and racking up a huge post count, begging for Reputation Scores won't get you anywhere. It's not even just about hanging around for a set amount of time.

Here's how you DO move up: participate thoughtfully and politely so that when Tamyrlin decides the time has come for a Raising, you're seen as an asset to the community. Or whenever he gets around to it.

When the feeling strikes him, Tamyrlin, The Lord Of The Board aka LotB, or Fearless Leader or Lordy, (but only I may get away with that one), confers with the Heroes of the Horn and Ancients and selects those to be raised to a higher level. It is an entirely manual and subjective process that stresses "quality" over "quantity." The amount of time since you gained your current rank plays a role, as do post counts, to a lesser extent. Thoughtful, intelligent and polite posting is by far the biggest factor.

Other important information...

The ESC does not stand for Escape. Instead it stands for the Entropy Sideline Club It has a big comfy couch, capable of fitting all TL members at once if they choose to sit there. Made of fire-proof, balefire-proof, and belafire-proof hope to God you aren't in the room if this occurs fabric. Comes with all sorts of built in coolers stuffed full of yummy snacks and drinks; for some reason, Mountain Dew seems to be a favourite around here and lots of places to just sit back and enjoy the reason you're sitting there. Basically if you hang out on the ESC Couch, you are observing the debates taking place: Iraq, religion, government, Santa Claus (you name it, we argue over it) and laughing at the people who are debating, and/or the debate itself. The ESC is not full of fence-sitters, rather we are ambivalent or way too smart to jump in. Or lazy. Most times, it's lazy. The ESC Couch (ESC Head Quarters) is located somewhere fun...lots of room for partying whenever the mood strikes us. We have recently debuted the WTF Couch...for those "Special" moments. Moments that induce the sharpening of the not-so-elusive poking stick. Poking posters with sticks is exclusively limited to Ancients and Heroes. We do, however, take requests.

The TCA. Theoryland Chataholics Anonymous. This group is comprised mostly of the younger set of TL members. not that there's anything wrong with that I have been assured they do more than sit in corners and stare at their navels. although I've yet to see evidence of that ~sarcasm~ They have a lot of fun, and most of it involves cookies. They are somewhat defunct right now, as we have no chat, alas! Don't worry, they'll be back with a vengeance as soon as chat is up and running here. Lordy says, soon. ~shifty eyes~

Quotemasters, AKA Masters/Mistresses of the Quote:
If you sign up for a Premium membership to the site, you get the ability to search the database for quotes to back up your theories, or the theories of those you like. It also gives you the ability to slam dunk the theories of others with a really well-placed quote. A Premium membership only costs $15 for a year and $50 for a lifetime membership. Just do it, you know you want to! But, a warning. Being in possession of a TL Premium membership does not a Quotemaster make. You must apprentice and train under the Quotemasters. Of which there are two and three quarters. Jason Wolfbrother, Callandor retired for now, Terez and the Quote Mistress, although she seems to be in semi-retirement: Me. You'll see me throw one in every now and again! Frenzy was the Dark Mother of us all she may occasionally find some time when her biological children are occupied and throw in a quote or two ;) Downside? You only get 100 quote searches a month, and a true quotemaster is invariably without quote searches towards the end, so they get cranky. Withdrawal does that, didn't ya know?

OK, I'm done. Hope for YOUR sake you read all that!:cool:

09-25-2008, 06:16 AM
I can't wait to be able to delete this Addendum.
Next century, if McCain is elected.